"Don't give me that look, Potter!"
"As a member of the House of Slytherin and heir to the Malfoy name, I am far more than capable of handling a few ruffian Muggles."
"You 'Gryffindor' oafs could benefit greatly from observing Slytherin."
Draco Malfoid Casual Illiustration
@JustAnArtLurker@DodgerWing Lucius would already be writing the invitations. Getting Harry Potter as his son-in-law would guarantee him tons of connections.
#Malfoid#HarryPotter#Fanfiction
Dumbledore stared in disbelief as he, Harry, and some glowy woman sat in front of a lake in Little Whinging. He'd been coming by to pick Harry up to go see Slughorn, but upon seeing the boy conversing with this glowing stranger who emerged from the water, this clearly took precedent.
"So," Dumbledore said, "when they said that King Arthur would return at a time of great need-"
"Sir Mallory got that bit wrong, always had to embellish," the woman sighed. "But no! His bloodline is correct, his heart is pure, and so..." She beamed at Harry, who was holding a shining sword, "all hail Harry! King of Magical Britain! Heir of House Pendragon!"
"Uh, Professor?" Harry asked, "now what?"
Dumbledore buried his face in his hands. He was silent for a long time.
"Now? Now we are going to call upon my old friend Horace Slughorn, and then I am going to go get very, very drunk."
The funniest: (Philosopher’s Stone)
“Oh, are you a Prefect, Percy?” said one of the twins, with an air of great surprise. “You should have said something, we had no idea.”
“Hang on, I think I remember him saying something about it,” said the other twin.
“Once– “
“Or twice–”
“A minute–”
“All summer–”
“Oh, shut up,” said Percy the Prefect.
The most profound: (Deathly Hallows)
“Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on Earth should that mean it isn’t real?”
The best advice: (Chamber of Secrets)
“Never trust anything that can think for itself if you can’t see where it keeps its brain.”
The realization: (Half Blood Prince)
“I am not worried, Harry,” said Dumbledore, his voice a little stronger despite the freezing water. “I am with you.”
The determination: (Prisoner of Azkaban)
“’I’m not going to be murdered,’ Harry said out loud.
‘That’s the spirit, dear,’ said his mirror sleepily.”
The life lesson: (Philosopher’s Stone)
“It takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to our enemies, but just as much to stand up to our friends.”
The plot twist: (Order of the Phoenix)
"Is it true that you shouted at Professor Umbridge?"
"Yes," said Harry.
"You called her a liar?"
"Yes."
"You told her He Who Must Not Be Named is back?"
"Yes."
Professor McGonagall sat down behind her desk, frowning at Harry. Then she said, "Have a biscuit, Potter."
The sassiest: (basically any of Professor McGonagall’s lines, but here are my favorites-
"I – I didn't think –"
"That," said Professor McGonagall, "is obvious."
"This boy has as much chance of becoming an Auror as Dumbledore has of ever returning to this school."
"A very good chance, then," said Professor McGonagall.
"Now, the Vanishing Spell –"
"Hem, hem."
"I wonder," said Professor McGonagall in cold fury, turning on Professor Umbridge, "how you expect to gain an idea of my usual teaching methods if you continue to interrupt me? You see, I do not generally permit people to talk when I am talking."
Harry witnessed Professor McGonagall walking right past Peeves who was determinedly loosening a crystal chandelier and could have sworn he heard her tell the poltergeist out of the corner of her mouth, "It unscrews the other way.”
JK Rowling’s writing is definitely responsible for most of the magic in the Harry Potter universe.
Lucius Malfoy’s New Secret Underground Room
Harry: Sir, thank you again for inviting me! Is this a new underground room? The previous one wasn't nearly this complicated, and the layout seems completely different.
Lucius: ...No.
Harry: Ah, okay!
Lucius: Now, shall we chat and practice our magic?
Harry: Absolutely, Sir!
And so, another perfectly normal afternoon of magical training and father-in-law bonding began.
Meanwhile, upstairs...
Dracaena: Mother, where's Harry?
Narcissa: Harry? Dear, he isn't here.
Dracaena: ...I can feel him, Mother.
Narcissa: Nonsense. Go clean yourself up and have something to eat.
Dracaena: No! I shall find him and hug him!
Narcissa: My goodness. I thought you hated that boy.
Dracaena: I-I am perfectly normal about him!
Narcissa: Of course, dear.
Dracaena: I MUST FIND MY HARRY!
Narcissa: ...Your Harry?
Dracaena: I MEAN POTTER! HARRY POTTER!
Narcissa: Naturally.
Dracaena marched off, her face red as a tomato.
Narcissa: sighs That boy has completely conquered my daughter's heart.
Meanwhile, deep underground...
Lucius: And that concludes today's training, Harry. Shall we meet again tomorrow, or perhaps later as usual?
Harry: Yes, Sir! Thank you very much. I've learned a great deal today.
Lucius: Excellent. Now, use that door and run. Quickly.
Harry: Um... all right? Shouldn't I inform Madam Malfoy that I'm leaving?
Lucius: No, no, no. Absolutely unnecessary. Off you go!
Harry: Oh. Okay, Sir!
Harry hurried through the mysterious door.
Lucius waited until the footsteps disappeared, then teleported directly to the front entrance of Malfoy Manor.
He opened the door.
Dracaena: FATHER! WHERE IS HE?!
Lucius: Who?
Dracaena: HARRY!
Lucius: I have just arrived home, young lady. Now, please move aside.
Dracaena: ...You're hiding him.
Lucius: Nonsense.
Dracaena: You ARE hiding him!
Lucius: Dracaena, I am your father. Do you honestly believe I would lie to you?
Dracaena: Yes.
Lucius: ...
Dracaena: I CAN SMELL HIM, FATHER!
Lucius: Yes, yes. Very impressive. Perhaps you should become a bloodhound.
Dracaena: FATHER!
Lucius: Now, off you go. Your mother is waiting.
The Malfoy Manor
Lucius: Potter.
Harry: Sir Malfoy.
Lucius: Sit.
Harry: Thank you, sir.
Harry takes his seat in an enormous leather armchair. Lucius sits opposite him, a silver cane resting beside his chair. The room is quiet, elegant, and filled with portraits of generations of Malfoys.
Lucius: Now, tell me. What history do you know about our House?
Harry: Very well, sir. I've done quite a bit of research, actually.
Lucius: Have you?
Harry: Yes. The House of Malfoy is one of the oldest surviving pure-blood wizarding families in Britain, although the exact origins of the family name are somewhat disputed. The family has historically valued wealth, political influence, magical heritage, and the preservation of its position in wizarding society.
Lucius raises an eyebrow.
Harry: The family's influence became particularly prominent through land ownership, patronage, and connections with the Ministry of Magic. However, I think it's important to distinguish between the family's actual historical achievements and the reputation it has cultivated.
Lucius: An interesting distinction.
Harry: Thank you, sir. The Malfoys have also demonstrated a remarkable ability to survive political upheaval. During periods of conflict, members of the family have frequently attempted to preserve their position by maintaining influential connections.
Lucius: You make that sound rather cynical, Potter.
Harry: I'm sorry, sir. I didn't mean it as an insult.
Lucius: Continue.
Harry: I would say that the defining characteristic of House Malfoy isn't simply wealth or bloodline. It's adaptability. The family understands that power isn't merely the ability to command others. It's the ability to influence institutions, preserve resources, and ensure that the next generation inherits something stronger than the last.
Lucius slowly sets down his glass.
Harry: Of course, the family has also suffered from the consequences of its political choices. I think the greatest mistake a house like yours could make would be to confuse its reputation with its actual strength. A family can possess enormous wealth and still lose everything if it mistakes pride for wisdom.
Silence.
Harry: Was that too much, sir?
Lucius: ...
Harry: Sir?
Lucius: Potter, do you realize that you've just summarized several centuries of my family's history, including its greatest strengths and most persistent weaknesses, without once consulting a book?
Harry: I read quite a few books, actually.
Lucius: Splendid!
Lucius suddenly looks delighted.
Lucius: Absolutely splendid! You're intelligent, observant, and capable of understanding political history beyond the superficial nonsense most students memorize for examinations.
Harry: Thank you, sir.
Lucius: You're reckless, certainly. You seem to have an unfortunate habit of throwing yourself into danger whenever someone needs help.
Harry: I suppose that's true.
Lucius: And your magical affinity is extraordinary. I've heard enough accounts of your exploits to know that your potential is considerable.
Harry: That's very kind of you, sir, but I—
Lucius: No.
Harry: ...No?
Lucius: Don't use that word.
Harry: Which word?
Lucius: The word you're about to use to decline my invitation.
Harry: Oh. Okay.
Lucius: Good. Now, Harry, I believe you should join my House.
Harry: Thank you, Sir, but I have to.
Lucius: I know
Harry: Sir, I
Lucius: Potter.
Harry: Yes, sir?
Lucius: I said no declining.
Harry: Right. Sorry.
Lucius: Excellent. You'll make a fine addition to our circle. And perhaps you could invite that rather agreeable red-haired friend of yours.
Harry: Ron?
Lucius: Weasley, yes. The boy who stood by you during your adventures. He could use a little exposure to better financial management.
Harry: REALLY?!
Lucius: ...I beg your pardon?
Harry: Sorry, sir! I mean, that's awesome! Ron would love that! I really appreciate it!
Lucius: There. You see? We understand one another perfectly.
Thank you to @tim_cook for visiting us and experiencing "A Wider New Eridu" together.
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