Emily McKay

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

Damn I USED to be friends with a lot of fake ass people lmfao scum up

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

@nooodle25 If it don’t stick to the cabinet it ain’t done. That’s on chef Boyardee

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

Some girl at the bar crop dusted me so hard that I thought I was going to die

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

I really have never been this happy to see the cowboys winning

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

This dry January I’ve been antiquing and reading cookbooks who the fuck am I

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

I’m literally listening to a cookbook on vinyl marley is going to divorce me

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

Unpopular opinion: the mummers parade is fucking stupid

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

@TheDerekFrazier That’s what the fuck I’m saying. I made this tweet before I knew where he was from and then I asked if he was from the northeast and he said yeah I said of course you are lmao

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

Some idiot just tried to tell me a cheesesteak hoagie wasn’t a thing. He said that’s like a cheeseburger on a long roll…..that would be a cheeseburger hoagie take your northeast ass back to the northeast bruh

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

@clairekuz Fr tho? Who gave you permission for that lol

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

How come everytime you show an older person a picture on your phone they always try to scroll to the next picture? Did I say that was okay??? Idk what’s coming next?

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

Guys who come out of the bathroom at the bar and don’t wash their hands actually repulse me. Like you just held your dick in your hand to pee and you’re not gonna wash it??

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

At least we still have the eagles 🤷🏼‍♀️

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

Once the thought of calling out of work even enters my head it’s a wrap and there’s no looking back

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

Should I wear this to thanksgiving at Marleys parents this year???

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

Sexts from my foreman>>>>>

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

@psimacoolmom @marleyhm MF RIGHT. Smart kid you got there

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

If you get in the HOV lane and do the speed limit you’re a rat and your mom doesn’t love you

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

Not another lesbian at the post Malone concert wearing the same exact jersey as me 😐

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

Truly cannot stand people that stop at yellow lights

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

@Peppa_Bae Yeah if I sold my car and my soul maybe Lmao

[Emily McKay @flem_mmy]

I wouldn’t live in manayunk even if you gave me a free house