David Alpha Strider

i got fucked by an elk once

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

@RedEyed_Knight make sure the industry thinks im some shitty angel so i can be loved for centuries or whatever the shit

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

@RedEyed_Knight it was stupid as shit and he said the idea was fuckin rediculous like his face isnt any less rediculous but you know gotta >

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

@RedEyed_Knight sad fuckin parent who needs to keep his child on track but im not the one fuckin a pornstar with an elk dong what the shit >

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

@RedEyed_Knight elk porno but no the porn industry is risky as shit for my scratch that our career so like he had to protect me like some >

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

@RedEyed_Knight me it was so children could watch my movies like shit son i didnt know i wrote kids movies what if i want to write a fuckin>

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

@RedEyed_Knight it in american pie so why yhe shit cant my characters be fucked by elks it was a great story but no the fuckin boss told >

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

@RedEyed_Knight haha my resume was never needed so of course i didnt use it in my fuckin resume i wrote it in a movie tho i mean they did >

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

@RedEyed_Knight really its unavoidable but at least youll have somethin to write about in your resume

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

@RedEyed_Knight that depends on if youve ever imagined tiptoein by an elk dong before without gettin it shoved in some type of orifice

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

dont get fucked by elks
peace out

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

why i gotta be the oldest strider in the house

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

when people think youre 20 but youre actually 40: 🙏🙏🙏

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

lol

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

lay off with the fishpuns u gillgrowing fuckass

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

sometimes i come over to your moms place and pretend to be the mailman

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

sorry i cant hear you im wearing shades

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

i am looking myself in the mirror and i see sm regret man

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

get out the way bitch, the king is coming thru

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

fuck me in the asa and call me skippy

[David Alpha Strider @FmaousAlpha]

who the fuck