ur mum

😔😞😣

[Dr Will(iam) @WillJColes]

I have no idea when or how it entertained mainstream British English, but I really hate the term ‘picky bits’.

[COCO @TWOTIMESABITCH]

of couse your wife can’t cook like your mom. YOU SHOULD! you’re her son. you ate her food your whole life.

[Petite Ebony Girl 🇵🇸 @PetiteEbonyGirl]

Most serial killers started by harming small animals, then killing bigger animals and eventually humans. Glad she nipped that in the bud.

[DisneyToonz @DisneyToonz]

Mia Talerico, known for portraying Charlie Duncan on ‘GOOD LUCK CHARLIE,’ will start her senior year of high school this year.

#GoodLuckCharlie

[James Longman @JamesAALongman]

Hello @SouthernHsg_UK @IslingtonBC this is the mould in my 81 year old mother’s flat - which you’ve taken years to do anything about. Can you fix it please

[raftel 🏴‍☠️ @sloorfy]

No performative shit but something about calling the woman you love a bitch don’t sit right with me

[Lisa @lisathebeauty1]

I think Apple lying about this storage shit😭

[nat !! @hugzlino]

"you guys follow a bad person :("

"who?"

"dm"

WHY ARE WE PROTECTING THEM??? JUST SAY WHO IT IS OH MY GOD

[Alan Clark @Alan_Clark77]

When you go out for a meal now In the UK . . . . Why are Starters now at £10 ??

[The Impatient Tourist @ImpatienTourist]

The fuck you mean you can't control your toddler and now I have to stay overnight somewhere because our flight couldn't take off in time before the airport shuts down?

[Chief Palm Officer @pingmaestro]

@CanadianPolling I’m never flying Porter then.

1. Everyone pays the price for one unruly passenger (it’s only a child here, can you imagine a real incident?)
2. Every parent boarding with a child will now wonder if they’re going to be judged for their kid’s behaviour.

[Polling Canada @CanadianPolling]

Okay? Kick the entire family out then

[NowThis Impact @nowthisimpact]

'I am so, so happy that I voted for him.'

[𝕊𝕒𝕞𝕞𝕪 @FromN5_]

why does everyone at the pharmacy take 15 minutes and then when i get up there it’s over in 5 seconds

[Spider-Man Vibe 🕷️ @SpiderManVibe]

I don’t usually get involved in political stuff, but some things need to be said.

Spider-Man and Stan Lee would never support ICE.

Not now. Not ever.

Fuck ICE. 🖕

[Impeach Trump a 3rd Time! @Christo12919382]

Anyone else realize this?

[cold @coldeadcorpse]

@coulddberiri “I’ll defend my wife if an armed intruder ever broke in, but until that very rare scenario happens I’ll sit back and do buttfuck nothing”

[riri @coulddberiri]

“I’d take a bullet for my wife” how about you take out the trash ngga

[Covie @covie_93]

Abdul El-Sayed and his wife look like they actually like each other.