Kush Did 9/11

Open your eyes, sheeple

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

The best thing about porn is that the girls are actually into you and not the gross guys that they're screwing

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

I was expelled from the 5th grade cuz my trailing cloud of puberty stench was described by faculty as "immoral" & "acutely self-aware"

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

@badcono to clarify, they do it ironically

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

@badcono ironically, they do make Littlest Pet Shop toys there

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

@internetluke @Kyle_Lippert i have to side with T-Mac in that my life is more like oo ahh oo, dum dum ditty

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

What: Cannibal Dinner Party
Where: My place
When: 6:00pm tonight
Menu: the first one of you fucks to use the "you are what you eat" joke

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

Opinions are like dicks: everyone has one and every-
What do you mean girls dont have opinions

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

@Jordan_Hogness you heard me. The Nickel-O-Zone brought the motherfucking ruckus

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

Did kids' shows like Cousin Skeeter, Puzzle Place & Eureekas Castle actually happen or was my childhood one long puppet-centric fever dream?

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

Remember when you'd pretend to be asleep so that your dad would carry you out of the car? That works on cops too

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

Know someone with a unisex name? It's because they were born with a featureless Ken doll crotch that didn't develop until puberty.

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

Ok I get that bringing popcorn & a fold out chair to your yoga class looks pretty chauvenistic but Im hungry & get tired after like 4 poses

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

I tried to shame my mom for bad parenting by painting "BAD MOTHER" on her minivan but she added "FUCKER" to the end and installed a lift kit

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

Hey, dad? I need to tell you something.. I think I might be gay lol APRIL FOOLS I am gay af, like beyond the shadow of a doubt gay. Very gay

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

Wow so i havent seen a DIME of royalties from these jokers despite their use of my proprietary namesake

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

I'm still pretty embarrassed about the whole "Ass Wednesday" mix-up from a week ago. Sorry to everyone who saw those drawings

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

I bet I'll be able to name my first 3 or 4 kids before the mrs. realizes I'm just a big fan of TMNT and not Renaissance artists like I claim

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

Jawbreakers: the only candy with the balls to threaten its consumer with extreme bodily harm

[Kush Did 9/11 @FouRoux]

So maybe I "drink like a fish" & "smoke like a chimney" & "eat like a horse" & "sweat like a hog" but u gotta admit, Im damn good at similes