fudgedreport

Real-time monologue jokes about general news, odd stories and the occasional observation. You can ignore my jokes and just use as a wacked news aggregator.

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He wasn't a very good kisser anyway: DENTIST PULLS OUT EX-BOYFRIEND'S TEETH http://t.co/qoP7vAwB

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You'd need a pool of cocktail sauce... http://t.co/5N0eIBLU

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"Is that a Titleist?" http://t.co/pzOwpiih

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I'll take a Purell on the rocks. http://t.co/JxKQAoMI

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This is like Nerf buying "Balls.com" http://t.co/QB6qnl2S

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This would totally change the end to Old Yeller. http://t.co/SF1Shlfi

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That's like 40 Nicholas Sparks novels from now! http://t.co/0Gk1ITZ5

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That poor tuna needs some Neosporin. http://t.co/4lGnid7d

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Please eat the brown acid. http://t.co/knOCUoMD

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Ben and Jerry are Scientologists auditing you with Rocky Road. http://t.co/FAdBrHTT

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American Kennel Club: Red Irish Setter is an active, aristocratic bird dog, that loves riding atop speeding Chevrolets. http://t.co/vrLtoF3v

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Whales are their natural enemies. http://t.co/5jbMFR6E

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Subject of Nicholas Sparks's next book.
http://t.co/7w9YXWEM http://t.co/TLRYNO3v

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Down Periscope!
http://t.co/zW5XIBTu
http://t.co/9aoMXwUY

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"Hey Baby, I bet you were something before electricity."
http://t.co/5aGfp6es

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Then they chanted "Give us Barabas"
http://t.co/vuaOLna8

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Kind of like "The King's Speech" but instead of stuttering, he has Big Mac in his mouth. #kimjongun #northkorea http://t.co/Yrm06Uzw

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Every time your parents watch NCIS, Moonves buys a golden Ferrari. $CBS #executivepay http://t.co/cdrCzcRS

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El Salvador heralds 1st murder-free day in nearly three years - “Let’s fire our guns in the air in... http://t.co/lCOkR90v

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The Sweater Vest Goes Silent…
BREAKING: SANTORUM DROPPING PRESIDENTIAL BID
http://t.co/X4NiU5YL