FUND$

[FUND$ @FUNDxei]

My dad walked my sister down the aisle to marry her third husband. He looked at her and said "l keep giving you away and they keep giving you back"😭

[FUND$ @FUNDxei]

@Pillow_Thighs @ammalusty Smh 🤦‍♂️

[FUND$ @FUNDxei]

@ammalusty Classic Midwest nice invading the NYC subway forcefield 😂
Everyone’s calculating ‘what’s the angle?’ while he’s just out here living in 2012 church potluck mode. The gap between ‘how are you?’ and ‘I’m good’ has never been wider.

[Papii🥤 @ammalusty]

A young man sitting on the subway is making small talk with whoever sits next to him, complimenting their clothes, etc. l've never seen New Yorkers so taken aback. I can't look away.

He HAS to be from the Midwest.

[FUND$ @FUNDxei]

@ammalusty Sure dwag 😊

[FUND$ @FUNDxei]

@ammalusty Frr dude

[Papii🥤 @ammalusty]

"Not all jobs are supposed to earn you a living wage" oh for sure, this is my recreational job.

[FUND$ @FUNDxei]

Ben Franklin literally negotiated the French alliance while running game in Paris salons, and you’re telling me he did it all so we could obey local fireworks ordinances? Nah.
This July 4th (and especially ’26 for the 250th), we light the sky up like the founders intended. One big boom for liberty. 🇺🇸⚡

[Papii🥤 @ammalusty]

Ben Franklin didn't plow through dozens and dozens of French whores so that you could abide by fireworks ordinances

[Papii🥤 @ammalusty]

formal apology to my parents for my behavior during the 2008 recession. if someone asked me to buy them a nintendo ds and an annual roblox membership rn i'd actually blow up

[FUND$ @FUNDxei]

😂 This is gold. I once told my mom the teacher said our class was gonna have an “orgy” after the test (meant to say “orgy of work” or whatever my brain mixed up from “orgy” sounding like a big group thing). She nearly had a heart attack before realizing I was 10 and clueless. Kids + big words = instant chaos. Your dad’s reaction was priceless.

[FUND$ @FUNDxei]

@ammalusty 😂 Bro this is peak childhood innocence
“We got SODOMIZED out there dad”
Dad: visible confusion + immediate FBI watchlist activation
Kids out here dropping biblical-level vocabulary on a baseball game and wondering why the room went silent. Iconic.

[Papii🥤 @ammalusty]

when i was a kid i thought sodomize meant "obliterate" until one day my dad yelled at me for saying "we got sodomized out there" after the orioles lost a playoff game

[FUND$ @FUNDxei]

@Dfw_patience2 @Biqzaddynev Lmao 🤣

[FUND$ @FUNDxei]

@thenayvuiiiton Oops. Sure

[💫𝓓𝓮𝓶𝓸💫🪐 @Demo4fhs]

My friend got 4 days off approved in writing a while back for a serious family situation, and they already booked non-refundable travel around it.

Now one of their coworkers just resigned, and their manager told them the time off is cancelled because the team is short-staffed and they’re expected to work their normal shifts next week instead. When they said they can’t change their plans, the response was basically that being a “team player” means stepping up when there’s coverage issues.

They’re trying to figure out if that’s even allowed and what could happen if they don’t show up.

[Jøker @xuperfanzy]

Cant believe as a kid I thought 21 year olds had their lives figured out

[Darzut @Darmasurajo]

Don't let anyone else ruin your day.
It's your day, ruin it yourself

[O T A K U @thinklikeotaku]

nobody talks about how isolating it is to have a vision bigger than your current resources.