j.a.s.

I'ma get mines before I get got.

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

Last week, I walked out with someone's cable knit sweater, curtains, and Southpole jeans

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

Crazy thing is that I'm just coming in sometimes to talk

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

I make eye contact with him from like 300 ft away THROUGH THE DOOR and he gets my clothes from the back

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

Guy at my dry cleaner is on point -- a little too on point.

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

You afraid the extra distance will make you drop something? OH, IS THAT IT?

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

Also, fuck those people who park right in front of the dry cleaner and leave their hazards on. PARK AND WALK IN LIKE LAYMEN.

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

Because it's a bad look if you drop an eggshell white Nordstrom Oxford in the parking lot on your way in

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

So, what else is going on? A special bad to carry your clothes to be dry cleaned in: extra or nah? Tired of looking disorganized.

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

I, too, would like to believe someone's reading these tweets, sir.

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

It's like that "it's still real to me, dammit!" video, and the middle aged white guy that's crying is the only one here to see me.

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

This is like a bad open mic. And the only people in the crowd are those who've been riding with me since day 1.

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

I tweet like twice a year. I'll stop as soon as someone realizes I'm tweeting.

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

Hey, I'm tweeting!

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

@Abdu11ah @JoeGlo1 @CSNWizards @ZainZ24 he gonna have that slow ass Bernard King trot

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

@Abdu11ah @JoeGlo1 @CSNWizards @ZainZ24 seriously his back ain't gonna be able to take that extra weight.

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

@JoeGlo1 @CSNWizards @Abdu11ah @ZainZ24 my man look like he makes curry goat and rice & peas from the trunk of his car.

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

Now "tom ford" is playing and it's mad people bouncing off beat. #ImOut

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

Feel like I'm under suspicion by default being around this many young white women

[j.a.s. @funkylikemulch]

Feeling like drago when he was being lifted up on that ring before the Apollo Creed fight