Funny One Liners

One liners..ReTweets..The best of the old and the new humor compiled in one place.

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

Most Populated Cities in the World - https://t.co/CdxP3YB1M2

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

F.l.i.r.t = F**k love I'd rather tease.

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

The Strangest Airports - https://t.co/bJPN7AJ7xq

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

Some people hear voices.. Some see invisible people.. But others have no imagination whatsoever.

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

Now that the dog has dug up all the May flowers, I'm ready for summer.

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

I just wish pictures and mirrors could agree on what I actually look like.

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

Father: How far have you gone with a guy? Daughter: Once a guy... walked me home... so like a mile.

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

It is okay to be ignorant in some areas, but some people abuse the privilege.

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

Slogan of the day . . . "Don't let your affection give her an infection, put some protection on that erection!"

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

The surest sign that a man is in love is when he divorces his wife.

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

Democracy is three wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for dinner.

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

When I got home from work today the telephone rang. I picked up the phone & asked "Who is speaking?". The voice replied "You are you twit"

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

I went ahead and broke all my New Year's resolutions early so I could get on with enjoying the rest of the year.

Who's got donuts?!?

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

The good thing about having bad memory is that jokes can be funny more than once.

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

May your armpits be infested by the fleas of a 1000 camels

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

Stalking is when two people go for a long romantic walk together but only one of them knows it.

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

It was love at first sight. Then I took a second look !!

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, then why do some people have more than one child.

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

Top Most Sold Albums of all Time - https://t.co/NXCWoqlfih

[Funny One Liners @funnyone_liner]

Fifteen Things That Women Do That Annoy Guys - https://t.co/Y0eiGHBBK9