Graham

I can time travel and I like to party.

[Graham @futuregraham]

@Twitter Will my tweets change history? You probably need to fix this. I won't stop tweeting. You can't tell me what to do. #futuretweets

[Graham @futuregraham]

Feel free to use this picture next time @realDonaldTrump #CNN #ChrisChristie #Trump #FakeNews #FraudNewsCNN #ThisActuallyHappened

[Graham @futuregraham]

I thought #Wimbledon was a great tournament. Not really sure why they decided to revamp it. Replacing the grass courts with trampolines.

[Graham @futuregraham]

You two need to stop bickering and think about the good times ahead. @piersmorgan @Lord_Sugar #BestMates #DrawMeLikeOneOfYourFrenchGirls

[Graham @futuregraham]

When McDonald's started giving away free handguns in happy meals #AmericanGreatness #Freedom

[Graham @futuregraham]

Happy Canada Day! Fun Fact: on this day in 2024, Canadians decided to choose their own monarchy. King @justinbieber was a great leader.

[Graham @futuregraham]

#HowWasISupposedToKnow is a stupid hashtag. I do know. I know everything!! #omniscient #future

[Graham @futuregraham]

I can confirm an asteroid never hits Earth. So I assume this hashtag is about drugs and 'Asteriods' must be MDMA #WhenTheAsteroidHits #SayNo

[Graham @futuregraham]

#FridayFeeling doesn't have the same buzz since Emperor @sseagalofficial abolished weekends. Replaced by 7 days of non stop Seagal movies.

[Graham @futuregraham]

JayZ and Beyoncé used to be solid. But it soon soured and got to the point where they only communicated to each other through albums. #444

[Graham @futuregraham]

Futures Game used to be about baseball. Now it's about shooting lasers at electric spaceships whilst wearing white spandex. #future #amazing

[Graham @futuregraham]

#HeterosexualPrideDay was a great way to meet women 😏 If you like your women homophobic and with a penis... #AngryMen #DefinitelyNotGay

[Graham @futuregraham]

If @realDonaldTrump dad had stuck to putting his penis #Inhumans instead of #Indisabledsloths then the world would be a better place. #Trump

[Graham @futuregraham]

#NationalHandshakeDay was soon replaced by #NationalKickThemInTheShinDay but it didn't quite catch on.

[Graham @futuregraham]

@TheRock did a great job of retelling the horrific true story of Jumanji. Based on events from 1995. Some scenes were dramatised for film.

[Graham @futuregraham]

@TheRock did a great job of retelling the horrific true story of Jumanji. Based on events from 1995. Some scenes were dramatised for film.

[Graham @futuregraham]

Prime Day started off innocent. Until Amazon decided members had passed their prime after this day and started culling old people #PrimeDay

[Graham @futuregraham]

I know what was really to blame here. They are dangerous weapons. Burn all the books. #ProtectOurChildren #YouTube https://t.co/uqO40umFZF

[Graham @futuregraham]

@rickygervais In 2033 you apparently receive a message from god. You declare you're Jesus and you oust the pope. You look good in his hat.

[Graham @futuregraham]

@piersmorgan would it make you feel better to know Wenger eventually leaves Arsenal?.. well he doesn't. He's there for eternity. #wengerout

[Graham @futuregraham]

Also watch Frozen, it's nice.