Sometimes, you meet someone and wonder why they are so guarded. Why they question people’s intentions. Why they struggle to let people in, even when those people mean well.
And then you hear what they went through, and suddenly, the pieces begin to make sense.
Tram was only 17 when he experienced something that shook him deeply. Something that affected the way he saw himself, the way he saw people and, most importantly, the way he understood trust.
Imagine being that young and going through something that makes you question whether people will believe you, stand by you or turn against you. Imagine reaching a point where the pain becomes so heavy that you no longer see a way out.
Some experiences don’t simply become memories. They become walls.
They teach you to keep your feelings to yourself.
They make you question people’s motives.
They make you wonder if kindness comes with an agenda.
They make vulnerability feel dangerous.
So perhaps when Tram struggles to open up, there is more behind it than what we see. Perhaps the constant “what if this person is trying to get me?” is not arrogance or paranoia, but a defence mechanism built by someone who learnt very early that trusting people could come with a devastating price.
And honestly, hearing him speak about it made me see him differently.
Not as someone who has everything figured out. Not as someone who always gets it right. But as a young man carrying an experience that changed him, while still trying to figure out how to live beyond it.
His walls didn’t appear from nowhere.
And maybe he doesn’t need people to force those walls down. Maybe he simply needs to experience, over and over again, that there are people who won’t hurt him, betray him or weaponise his vulnerability.
Because sometimes healing isn’t about forgetting what happened.
Sometimes healing is learning that what happened to you does not have to determine everyone you meet afterwards.
And I hope Tram gets to experience that kind of peace. The kind that allows him to finally breathe, lower his guard and believe that he is safe enough to be completely, unapologetically himself.
FOCUS ON TRAM
TRAM X 160M
#Tram #BBNaija