G

No 💜

[scallop girl @pasta_niece]

world cup ends and suddenly no one wants to drink on a wednesday we’re cooked

[autist @litteralyme0]

How the start of summer felt those two weeks when we had 4 world cup games a day

[tay ! @homosexualitay]

lead tampon in me while i eat my listeria meat & cyclospora riddle veggies and wash it all down with microplastic water. afterwards, i inhale wildfire smoke and listen to the serene sounds of the data center built across the street. there’s a flock cam too recording it all

[Brian Stelter @brianstelter]

CNN's Kaitlan Collins: "We'll be monitoring what the president says tonight, as we always do, but aren't taking it live, given the president has a well documented history of saying blatantly false things about elections."

[MCPro24 @MCPro24]

BREAKING NEWS: CHUD Apollo 13 has been DISTANCEMOGGED by CHAD Artemis II

[SFGiants @SFGiants]

Stay cool, rookie 🥶

[hunter @3gpmh]

an evil woman is just an average man

[SFGiants @SFGiants]

Incoming

[𝐄𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐞𝐭 𝐇𝐲𝐩𝐞 @EffMktHype]

Literally the perfect meme

[Slightly Biased @BiasedSlightly]

look at how beautiful this is

pictures like this really make me feel we should bomb each other and charge thousands of dollars for life saving medication and sit in our car all day and work endless hours to eat jalapeño poppers and pay rent to Blackstone

[Jay Jurden @JayJurden]

77 degrees will have you acting like this

[bigsock @biggersocks]

what spring is going to feel like

[Sophia @kaliyugacowgirl]

“We will go down in history as the first society that wouldn’t save itself because it wasn’t cost effective.”
- Kurt Vonnegut

[Jamie Bonkiewicz @JamieBonkiewicz]

Why are the standards higher for The Bachelorette than the President of the United States?

[“paula” @paularambles]

they call this neighborhood the sunset because it’s where the sun sets? so what did they name the beach, ocean beach?

[jainormis @jainormis]

your future wife IS at the disgusting dive bar

[Lemón 🍋 @cigarettesummer]

Alcohol isn’t bad for you if it’s served at a sunny outdoor seating

[regan kelly @midwestern_baby]

i was absolutely born in the right generation. i love being drunk in an uber home at 2:48 on a thursday , no kids, one cat, about to microwave some bullshit from trader joe’s.

[Boston Globe Pitchbot @BostonSatire]

Think you can predict what will happen next in the war with Iran?

Enter code “REGIMECHANGE” for a 25% boost on a 16-leg parlay with DraftKings, the official betting partner of the Raytheon

[Bob Golen @BobGolen]

I haven't exaggerated in like a million years.