garthvaderstein

sweetest boy....according to my meemaw

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

I may not have a lot of money, but I’m rich with the things that really matter: friendship…love…napkins I stole from chipotle.

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

I remember being 13 and seeing the trailer for the Mario movie and being so excited to go see it with my parents. Now I’m 43 and I get to see the new one with my kids. I’m still as excited as I was when I was 30 years ago. And there’s something magic about that.

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

You know you’re old and irrelevant when you see all these posts like “Dream face reveal OMG” and you’re like “Who the hell is Dream?!”

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

All I’m saying is that if not losing socks in the laundry was a competitive sport, I would be the Lebron James of that sport.

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

@coryisntfunny Moblin Digler

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

I hate it when I’m in the grocery store and I’m wearing my chef coat from work and people are looking in my cart silently judging my purchases. Yeah I cook for a living but my kids are basic. Lemme get my Kraft Mac and cheese and Poptarts in peace Brenda.

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

@Guycicle So…when they released ET in England, did Elliot lure him in with a scone and a cup of tea?

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

@anotherantinode As far as I know it went through. I haven’t streamed since April, so I’m not exactly sure. I know that people can’t sub to me any more though. I’m curious if I can still switch around my emotes tho. I will keep you updated.

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

Spotify - “Thanks for listening to this ad, enjoy the next 30 minutes of music ad-free!”
Me - Listens to one Phish song
Spotify - “…Now at Taco Bell…”

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

@Guycicle Big Lebowski, Dexter, and Anchorman…as well as a few killer video games. I always knew you were a man of taste. Good luck with the move my friend

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

@iamaa_ron1

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

@MadMantis2 Looks awesome man! And the title…

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

@iamaa_ron1 Plot twist…all those people are now dead.

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

@anotherantinode Yeah, that was probably the toughest part about it

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

Had a thicc twitlonger written, but its not really needed. I have decided to end my affiliateness with twitch. Not saying I will never stream again, but if I do, I don’t want money to be involved. No more ads, no pressure, just homies hangin out playin games. See ya friends❤️

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

@iamaa_ron1 @terezolivia You guys get to eat?!

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

You guys remember back when you heard that somebody you knew had gotten Covid and you sanitized EVERYTHING you owned and stayed inside for two weeks while taking your temperature 8 times an hour?

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

Y’all I just got blocked by someone for the first time (I think) on Twitter, and I gotta say, I really feel like I’ve arrived.

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

@hath36 Looks like he couldn’t find the hammer

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

@drengus861 Lmao, funny thing is if there really was pizza during the show, I’m the one who would have had to cook it since I’m the district chef.

[garthvaderstein @garthvaderstein]

When you go to your kids orchestra concert and she’s all “yeah, it’s just my grade (8th) playing tonight” and then you get the program😡