collagen, mostly

he/him

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

i am so unf athomabyl larg e. ,,, .............. .

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

@boygrlbutchtwnk Chappy-kun is crazy

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

@boygrlbutchtwnk #coolbeans

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

@spadeofsevens tttt

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

Eschatology has always been popular but I didn't expect it to sweep the math world

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

@chipstar64 1:10 the ending was interesting

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

@eggnormouse absolutely horrid darling

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

@vdos2643 0:47

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

@aoiatuage 0:19; I filled in all the boxes then filled in the whole curve to be efficient

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

I am not supposed to be an anxiety-ridden wreck who always feels like he is going to explode. I am supposed to fit into one of the stereotypes which are assigned to me according to how I look, dress, act, my interests, and who my friends are.

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

The hundred mirrors in my head have constructed a third party which reads what I write as I write it. Of course he has failed, they say. No healthy individual should conjure up a hundred mirrors in his head and crumble under the weight of wrestling his reflection.

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

This worldview is self-defeating; by adopting it and believing it is true I take actions which are extremely bad for life outcomes measured by any metric, including this worldview. So I must lie to myself and force myself to not believe in the factor model with varying magnitudes

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

Let me describe one of my recurring anxieties. Normal random variables show up in real life when there are additive random effects with a little regularity (Lyapunov condition) due to the central limit theorem, and log normal shows up when we instead have multiplicative effects.

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

However this leads me to think very hard about what is the highest leverage thing I could be doing and end up doing nothing, staring at the wall as my thoughts get louder and louder and my heart beats faster and faster.

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

The more disgusting part of me is the part which believes he is clever for unearthing this symmetry: that many authors believe that their audience care more about what they write than they themselves care for the writing of others.

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

A part of my brain which everyone else has is missing and it doesn't matter how good the other parts of my brain are because I cannot use them to simulate that missing part. It does not matter how many volumes of words I think or write because they cannot amount to common sense.

[collagen, mostly @gausslaw2]

While I am writing this I am thinking of my incredible foolishness. I am disgusting. I pay little attention to others' tweets and yet I implicitly demand them to read the verbal vomit of a panic attack. I am disgusting. I expect others to obey a contract which I routinely shirk