General Tso Band 🤘🏻

🎶 Making Ambient Elevator #RockandRoll music. #GeneralTso serves Tasty Riffs, Succulent Beats and no MSG. New Album Spring 2018.

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

Minnesota is basically Diet Canada.

[Brandy Jensen @BrandyLJensen]

would you ask a man to give up his senate seat just because he died

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

Does anyone make road cases for tambourines?

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

🖐🏻🤚🏻 Be careful out there folks. #4thofJuly2018

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

Chlorophyll is grass blood.

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

The real reason nobody has come Back from the Future to help us is that there's no hope for us.

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

There should be a unit of time named for how quickly someone changes the radio whenever Nickelback comes on.

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

It’s beginning to get a bit uncomfortable asking Siri to play more Isis. https://t.co/nbnF49HJtD

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

How long before someone samples the @hqtrivia theme song in a @billboard Top 100 song?

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

Does anyone else think Britney Spears looks like she’s over 50? Or that she dances like a frittata? We can’t be alone on this. #NewYearsEve2018 #ABCNYE

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

What’s it take to be an @hqtrivia guest host? Is the goal here to get @ScottRogowsky a raise?

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

🦃 Happy mass bird murder day. #Thanksgivingday2017

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

🇨🇦 The graffiti in Canadian bathrooms is way different than the US. #TourLife

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

What one thing do all cities in the US have in common? The local news is always amateur hour. #TourLife

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

Cookie dough is the sushi of desserts. #ShowerThoughts

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

Onion rings are really just vegetables donuts. #ShowerThoughts

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

Your stomach thinks all potatoes are mashed potatoes. #ShowerThoughts

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

Well, time to move. https://t.co/1UnukASMFi

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

@analisux Whoa girl, it’s never that bad.

[General Tso Band 🤘🏻 @generaltsoband]

@garimasayshi The other three horsemen of the apocalypse are right around the corner.

[ficklenuts @ficklenuts]

Hell’s lobby only plays Nickelback, has no phone reception or WiFi, and has nothing but golf magazines to read.