Get Slizzerd

I work for the #redcross and you know that when we go #slizzard we do it right. BYAHHHHHHHHHHHH! I wanted a #G6 but all I could afford was a #G5

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

A prohibitionist is the sort of man one wouldn't care to drink with -even if he drank. -H. L. Mencken #TeamAutoFollow

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

An optimist is a man who looks forward to marriage. A #pessimist is a married optimist.

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

#Metadata is always true! -20h #TeamFollowBack

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

#BOFH excuse #408: Computers under water due to #SYN flooding. #followback

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

Kettering's Observation: Logic is an organized way of going wrong with confidence. #afb

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

#Unnamed Law: If it happens, it must be possible. #InstantFollowBack

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

#Concept, n.: Any "idea" for which an outside consultant billed you more than $25,000.

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

#Faceiro como guri de tirador novo.

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

A boy gets to be a man when a man is needed. -John #Steinbeck

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

I've always made it a solemn practice to never drink anything stronger than tequila before breakfast. -R. #Nesson #teamfollowback

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

A stunning blonde, but probably all bean dip above the eyebrows. #instantfollowback

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

Two can Live as #Cheaply as One for #Half as Long. -Howard Kandel

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

#QOTD: "I never met a man I couldn't drink handsome." #iFollowback #instantly

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

*** ******* ********* ****** Confucius say: "Is stuffy inside fortune cookie." ******* *** #iFollowback

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

On the eighth day, #God created #FORTRAN.

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

On the #Internet, nobody knows you're a dog. -Cartoon caption

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

Be it our wealth, our jobs, or even our homes; nothing is safe while the legislature is in session. #followback

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

Of all the animals, the boy is the most unmanageable. -Plato

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

#Bell Labs Unix -Reach out and grep someone. #InstantFollow

[Get Slizzerd @getslizzerd]

#Olmstead's Law: After all is said and done, a hell of a lot more is said than done.