Gillian Praetorius

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

@elonmusk A

[Millennial MD @Millennial__MD]

If people saw what a full code actually looks like, I don't think many people would sign up for it.

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

If only I got paid commission based on how many patients I greeted at triage last night. #EDnursing

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

The Body Shop has a sale for today only... 42.0% off everything. And a special deal on hemp lotion: 4x for $20. #420friendly

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

My pt told everyone she didn't want the nurse with long hair & glasses coming anywhere near her. So I tied my hair up & took off my glasses.

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

I give up Netflix for Lent and FiOS conveniently​ gives me 2 free months of HBO. Sometimes the stars align perfectly 🌟🌟🌟

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

HIMYM S7:E5 featuring University College Cork 😁🍀 #TheEwokLine

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

"I wasn't drunk, I was moderately inebriated." @dpraetorius

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

I told my mom I got pulled over and the first thing she asks me is if the cop was cute. 😂

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

"I know you're stressed, but instead of getting drunk you should just do what other college guys do and masturbate instead." #DoctorsOrders

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

I've seen patients do weird shit but this is the first time I've walked in on my patient getting motorboated by her baby daddy

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

"Give me OPIATES or give me a SANDWICH." -Frequent Flyer

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

Just asked my brother to pass me the Kanye pepper #cayenne

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

To be completely honest, all I had for breakfast today was wine. #NightShiftProbs #NightShiftPerks

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

My patient was hit by a car while riding his bike because he was playing Pokémon GO

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

Nurse Notes:

05:07: Pt requesting Ativan.
05:13: Pt asleep.
#GOMER

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

My patient's admitting diagnosis was 'proctalgia' which literally translates to 'pain in the ass' 😂

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

In no circumstance is it OK to give your 4 year old kid 325mg of aspirin. 😓

[Gillian Praetorius @gil618]

You know it's bad when your bartender gives you a bottled water along with your drink @sarahschowyy