Grandiose Tortoise

Nothing to see here.

[The Lincoln Project @ProjectLincoln]

Oh look, the Commerce Department quietly announced 7 new equity stakes in private companies.

Brought to you by the people fighting "communism."
https://t.co/D9XRML3izw

[Grandiose Tortoise @gnemiroff]

@CFBKings Ohio State is the only exception. They cry like little bitches.

[Joel Montfort @jmontforttx]

The plan is to erase physical knowledge so they can monetize it.

[Grandiose Tortoise @gnemiroff]

@Acyn

[Grandiose Tortoise @gnemiroff]

@mclv147 @JohnLeFevre Republican voting hicks who we slobber all over about hard work love weed more than anyone. You’re an idiot.

[Grandiose Tortoise @gnemiroff]

@pismosteve @JohnLeFevre That’s exactly what a giant puss would say.

[Grandiose Tortoise @gnemiroff]

@Big_Texan_806 @JohnLeFevre Great. You would ruin any blunt rotation

[Dr Ahmad Rehan Khan @AhmadRehanKhan]

Elon Musk called The Economist's Editor-in-Chief "a traitor to the West" after a tough interview. For someone who brands himself a free speech absolutist, attacking a respected journalist over difficult questions looks deeply hypocritical.

[nyara @nyaraVT]

I love how leftists are told to settle for “slow change”

while conservatives destroy all the progress we’ve made as a species within a year or two

[SeedOfEvil @hectorhs85]

@WhiteHouse

[Lisa @Limare64]

@WhiteHouse 🤔

[Georgia Coley @artwithinpod]

I truly believe this guy is in, like, the bottom tier of intelligence among human beings. like that's an astronomical idiot talking. I don't even think I *know* anyone who is this stupid. he is living proof that making money does not make you smart or interesting.

[‏ً @omgsidewalks]

I saw a post on Reddit that said that “The underlying purpose of AI is to allow wealth to access skill while removing from the skilled the ability to access wealth.” And I don’t think I’ve ever seen AI described so incisively.

[Aaron Rupar @atrupar]

Ossoff: "The price of admission to the president's service seems to be proof that you're willing to lie for him. Have you seen it? Maybe you saw Jay Clayton, the president's nominee to lead our intelligence services, refuse again and again while he was under oath to affirm Donald Trump's defeat in 2020, or Pete Hegseth before the Senate this week refusing to recant his lies about the war. There's something uniquely despicable about lying a nation into war, treating citizens as fools."

[Bernie Sanders @BernieSanders]

Elon Musk Wealth
2012: $2 billion
2026: $719 billion

Jeff Bezos Wealth
2012: $18.4 billion
2026: $255 billion

Mark Zuckerberg Wealth
2012: $17.5 billion
2026: $212 billion

Federal Minimum Wage
2009: $7.25
2026: $7.25

Obscene. We must raise the minimum wage to a living wage.

[Grandiose Tortoise @gnemiroff]

@CFB_Throwback Last home game before I left AA. What a win. Chris Perry crushed OSU

[Thomas Massie @RepThomasMassie]

The U.S. has been significantly weakened by the war with Iran.

This administration depleted our missile defenses, drained our oil reserves, sacrificed our men & women, inflated the price of consumer goods, increased our debt, and neglected our domestic needs…

all for Israel.

[Hunter Biden @HunterBiden]

I watched Trump’s speech at the Correspondents’ Dinner last night.
It’s hard to articulate how sad it made me.

Sad and embarrassed and exhausted.

Here is the thing about a man who is a joke. He can’t tell one.

People think humor is a talent. It isn’t. It’s a capacity. To make someone laugh you have to be able to laugh at yourself, and to laugh at yourself you have to step outside of yourself and see what everyone else sees. For one second you have to be just another person in the room.

Most people can do this by the time they are nine years old.

He has never once managed it. Not in fifty years of cameras. Not for a second.

That is not a quirk. It is a symptom. The muscle that lets you tell a joke is the same one that lets you feel what another person feels. A man who cannot survive being laughed at cannot imagine being anyone but himself. He will only ever be generous when it is photographed. He will only ever be kind when it is filmed.

There is a name for it.

So he stood up there and did what he always does. He hit down. He made jokes about people’s weight. He made jokes about their intelligence. He made jokes about how women look. He read out the names of people he doesn’t like, and mocked them. Always mocking. And when no one laughed he blamed his speech writers.

The cruelty dressed as humor has worn so thin.

And for the 30% of you still in the cult who will inevitably call me a crackhead and blame it all on my Dad, all I can say is please, for the love of God, open your eyes. Wake the fuck up. Have some dignity. Have some pride.

Joe Biden wasn’t standing at that podium last night. Donald Trump was.

And at the end of it he put on a red hat that said Trump 2028 and told the room he was running again. No one laughed because everyone knows he has no intention of leaving.

Just another joke at our expense.

[Fuck You I Quit @fuckyouiquit]

18 months. $5 trillion fucking dollars in 18 months. And we still don't have healthcare. And they gutted education. And food assistance. And food safety, and clean air, and clean water. And cut 300k federal jobs. Where the actual fuck is that new spending actually going?