HiJack

Web3 is broken promises. The world works exactly as it should. Ethereum, Bitcoin, Solana, NEAR. Useless.

Stop trying to build a better way.

Big tech loves you

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

My Anti-Crypto Manifesto

Look around you. The world we've built has given us everything we've ever wanted. Why would you want this to change?

There is no need to "update the system" (ahem, @coinbase).

There is no need to build "the future of finance" (I am pretty sure the Harvard economists and banking institutions know how to run the economy)

There is no need to build "decentralized alternatives", sometimes people really do have your best interest in mind.

Meta gave us Facebook - for FREE!

Amazon gave us Alexa, near-instant delivery, and the Fallout TV series - at what cost? A couple bucks?! Worth it!

Google, don't even get me started, the search engine alone is reason enough to trust them with your data.

NOW - OpenAI! It's literally in their name, folks. They're open. Probably the openest version of AI. You really think they're out to get you, huh? That's called paranoia, kiddo.

Stop listening to the manlets at Ethereum, Solana, NEAR, Cardano, Avalanche, TON - they're all in it for themselves.

Everything is working as it should.

Trust me.

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

Good morning...or "Gm" as you seem to say in Web3☕️

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

The real spooky surprise is next week, buckos.

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

Packing for [REDACTED] and made sure to pack a whole bunch of cards that just say "I was right" on it.

This Bitcoin stuff is a fad, we know what happens next.

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

if it was up to me

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

[REDACTED] is canceled!

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

@NSAGov Amazing opportunities!

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

@idrawline yOU woUldN'T bELiEvE wHAT cOiN iS pUMPiNG rIght NOw

Jesus Lord, go outside.

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

@SKYTONET_ @token2049 @Google @amazon GET A REAL JOB

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

GM (it's what you nerds say, right?)

I went to @token2049. Everybody who met me saw the light. They're dropping out of crYpTO and heading to @Google, @amazon - and all the GREAT AMERICAN companies that built this place.

Next stop for me? [REDACTED]. Dumb name. Dumb people.

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

@SKYTONET_ @token2049 @Google @amazon To [REDACTED]? Only to show people the truth about wEbthrEE

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

I HAVE NOT and WILL NOT ever endorse CRYPTO or WEB3.

@token2049 was a spectacular FAILURE. Massive L as we would say on Wall St.

[REDACTED] (dumb name).

IS NEXT to be cancelled.

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

@HijackNear @ShitzuCommunity GET. A. LIFE. DORKS.

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

Finally, a voice of reason.

[Bitcoin Magazine @BitcoinMagazine]

JUST IN: 🇺🇸 Minneapolis FED President Kashkari says #Bitcoin remains worthless after 12 years 🤡

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

@ChillonNear @NEARProtocol Correct, kiddo

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

@idrawline You are better off looking for cucks in Web3, given that's basically all of you

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

@cuongdc_real ELEVEN THOUSAND NEAR-BUCKS AND I'LL LET YOU GET MORE NEAR-BUCKS

insane

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

@idrawline FINALLY YOU HAVE REALISED

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

@googlechrome @Adobe @ADCOLOR Remarkable, incredible moves from Google. I love you, Google!

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

@ChillonNear @NEARProtocol There will never be a bull market

[HiJack @Got_HiJacked]

@jarednotjerry The only thing NEAR and Web3 are cooking is a housefire