Goth E-Boy ASMR

He/Him but you can also call me your gothness or your Crabbiness. I make jokes. Dumb ones.

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

@JimmyHere This one right here big dog

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

Get me in Elon Musks' bed immediately. He has like 12 kids, so you know this man slam fucks.
#Musky #ElonMusk

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

Need a shawty to talk to me like the DOOM 3 soul cube after 5 kills. https://t.co/rWJcQ8HxZV

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

Sometimes you wake up and you just gotta uple snoops the poople snoops with the fukalang jukalnutes

[Casey Frey @caseykfrey]

Get tf out my way type way. @dvbbs @xxbridge

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

Need a shawty to talk to me like the DOOM 3 soul cube after 5 kills. https://t.co/rWJcQ8HxZV

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

If you listen to Despicable Me (the song) as nightcore song it just sounds like a drake song. #Drake #DespicableMe #minionstheriseofgru

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

Her: "You must be @JimmyHere pre-mustache with the emo boy green and red @Wes10 cut if you think we fucking."

Me:

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

The DQ in Delano Minnesota has bowed to the eldritch horror that is Taylor Hanson. This is a sad day. I am watching as the Era of man corroded under the weight of a prepubescent heart-throb. #TheHansons

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

Cum? You mean creative juice?

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

Sign this please you guys. I need my home to stay clean. And also because it smells like garbage and keeps attracting people from Los Angeles.
https://t.co/AEXVncd2mC via @Change

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

Put them in the bread box because they want to be bred

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

I just want everyone to know that nothing I say on here should be taken seriously. It is all one massive joke. I'm not actually even a crab. Or an E-boy.

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

Yo why the Google maps lady sound like a dommy-mommy?
#googlemaps

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

Call me Felix Kranken because I'm always Kranken it.
#waltenfiles

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

Jack Walter is submissive and breedable. That's why he died.
#waltenfiles

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

(Cont 2) Reason number 2) Mmmbop was not a song, it was a declaration. Taylor was telling us that he was coming. He was declaring that we needed to feed him babies or he would cause the end of the world.
#TaylorHanson #Eatsbabies #THEB

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

I feel like I should explain myself. Taylor Hanson is not a true Hanson. He is not born of the Hanson bloodline. He was an idea that took form, a being from the void who entered our universe. Taylor Hanson is an eldritch God. Heres why:
1)when he was young he was (continued)

[Goth E-Boy ASMR @GothAsmr]

(Cont 1.) androgynous looking. This is because he had forgotten how humans looked, but by the time he realized he had made a mistake he couldn't change into one sex because it would look suspicious if he suddenly had more secondary sex traits. (Continued)