grace🧚🏻‍♀️

[໊ @buffys]

“he isn’t even following the theme” #metgala

[Teddy - PolyBackTest.com @Bitcoin_Teddy]

Me at 18:

If i make it home by 4, i can still wake up to work at 6

Me now:

We are not starting a movie, it's 8 PM

[dana donnelly @danadonnelly]

sometimes I want to be skinnier but then I remember that body types are kind of like dog breeds and if im a corgi who wants to lose weight to look like an italian greyhound that won’t make me look like an italian greyhound it’ll just make me look like a sick ugly corgi so nvm

[WOR$T BRIDE IN AMERICA @theemisstoto]

idk if momtok will survive this

[Godman Chikna @Madan_Chikna]

My stocks watching a another Iranian ballistic missile on its way to hit a country.

[jezz @JezziiB]

Some important issues raised by feminists
1. Rape
2. Sexual harassment
3. Dowry killings
4. Domestic violence
5. Forced marriage
6. Human trafficking
7. Gender inequality

Some important issues raised by Men's Rights Activists :-
1. Girlfriend cheating
2 Why do men always have to pay for dates
3. Wife using husbands credit card too much
4. Only reservation for women in buses
5. Why should men cook at home ?
6. Girlfriend messaging other boys too much
7. Boys rejected by their crush

[positive side of X 🌞 @positivityofx]

Therapist: "There is a tiger in you"

The tiger in me:

[AtnsMDX @AtnsXBT]

the older i get, the more i hate making extra stops after work. i drive home like i'm late for my house

[𐌕 @fwtimini]

It's amazing how much you can accomplish around the house under the threat of someone coming over.

[p. @paola_m41]

me after watching The Dinosaurs documentary

[꧁✿Nessa✿꧂ @Softnessa_]

Sometimes male anger at ‘women getting special treatment’ reminds me of a gorilla experiment.
One gorilla gets a banana every hour. The females next to him get one every four hours. Then someone decides to be ‘fairer’ and gives the females a banana every two hours instead. The original gorilla? He flips out. He’s still getting his banana every hour, but it feels like a loss because his advantage shrank.
That’s how a lot of men react to basic fairness for women: not as justice, but as theft.

[le.hl @0xleegenz]

The war will end. The leaders will shake hands. The old woman will keep waiting for her martyred son. That girl will wait for here beloved husband and those childs will wait for their heroic father

I don't know who sold our homeland, but i saw who paid the price

[Nicki 🫧🪷 @nickimoraa]

As an adult I have learned that the most shocking and unexpected opponent in life is the person who owned your house before you.

[The Redheaded libertarian @TRHLofficial]

Finally, some wholesome and quality content.

[Zakia @zakiaonsol]

Parents need to get better at teaching their kids that swear words aren't actually bad they're just only appropriate in certain contexts, this 9yo girl at the grocery store just held up a bag of cauliflower rice and said
"WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS" and she deserves a fucking Oscar

[Kia 🧸ྀི @xevekiah]

My boyfriend and I were at the mall and he decided to act like he didn’t know me. He walks up all smooth and goes, “You’re too pretty to be shopping alone. Let me carry your bags.” Before I could even react, this girl from the next aisle pops up next to me and goes, “She’s not alone. I’m right here.” And just stands there staring at him 😭I told her he’s actually my boyfriend, but the way she clocked in for duty??? but honestly, girl… I appreciate you 😭👏

[Nicki 🫧🪷 @nickimoraa]

I be like “i need to lock in” and it’s just me moving the clothes from the washer to the dryer

[Brown Eyed Girl @Browneyes5152]

I've faced more peer pressure to eat protein as an adult than I did to take drugs in my teens.

[Mia♡ @luxemiaa]

okay but how FCKING elite was rearranging your room as a kid and suddenly it felt like a whole new place. you’d show your parents and they’d be like “wow very nice” and you’re standing there like FCK yes new room new me

[bryony @bryonycdc]

ffs that new instagram trend where you go to chat GPT and use a prompt to get a caricature of yourself and your job ‘based on everything you know about me’ do any of you have any self awareness, and do you realise how that sounds 🙃