KNIGHTRIDER

please don't tell my mom

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

AWOWWWW haven’t been here a while but..they deleted all my drafts!?!? There was gold there Jerry, GOLD

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

I’ll cry at work to get a better sale

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

Something’s wrong with my butt

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

At a job with multiple doors and continuously telling people “go around!” until they get frustrated and leave

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

hitting up friends for no reason smdh, cant even get my parole officer to get in touch with me

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

An actual doctor finally told me that I have hypertension, wow, now if only someone would listen to female practitioners

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

How do people relax without little cats hunkering down on top of you

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

What is love Kimberly

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

Wow life is a lot? Anyone else ?

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

What the hell does it mean when you have a smiley face saved on your Apple iPhone calender? Was I supposed to get laid today and forgot?

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

At the planned parenthood desperately needing to take a shit but they won’t let me use the bathroom because people are peeing in little cups in there

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

@predederva lol

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

I know I say this every summer, but as a Palm Springs born and bred desert bitch…anyone talking shit about the heat, suck a dry ass desert dick and then let’s talk

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

Why is it always your most psychotic unhinged friend that recommends meditating

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

Give me sparkling water or give me death

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

Calling ICE on myself just to see if there’s any hope of a free one way ticket out of here

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

Calling ICE to report my moms boyfriend because he didn’t compliment the soufflé I made

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

Pretending to be dead so I don’t have to help my mom move heavy objects on my day off

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

I fixed my own plumbing ( I just turned off the water ) genius

[KNIGHTRIDER @greasextrap]

Bro where did all my drafts go