Greg Cottman

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 Why is that guy taking his shorts off in the background? Is this kid playing Duelling Banjos?

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 Thank you, Dr. Streetmentioner.

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@bazrad68 @Hardywolf359 If it gets stuck then just give it a little tap.

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 It's odd that I've never thought "Thank God for headstems" before, and will prolly never think it again.

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 It's the sketchy look from the kid in the floatie that totally makes this picture.

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 This is kind of genius! Low rent, but genius.

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 Does the Doritos moisturizing wash turn your face orange?

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 And look at the grass in the background... He's bracing with the wind, not against it!

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 Is Cofidis a Greek brand of Viagra?

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 Day 76 of our infiltration... We think our ongoing failure to hatch is making her suspicious.

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 Sounds like they're shit outta luck.

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 Jackson Pollock's great-grandchildren decorate their parent's car.

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 Wow, controlling mother issues much? I see years of therapy in that young man's future!

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 I love Nick's working assumption that he's writing a note to someone who no longer lives there. "I know you'll prolly never read this, but can you let me know anyways?"

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 ZOMG! Juice!?! "Yes son, we wanted you to grow up with black, stumpy teeth so we always made sure your Crib Dribbler was full of sugary, sticky juice."

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 Ima go with crazy cat lady who now lives completely on the ground floor.

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 They originally went with "all across the disc", but their PR consultant made them change it.

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 Looks like love at first sight to me.

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 Oh, please tell me they're chasing a gangbanger in a toy Escalade. #AccidentInAisle5

[Greg Cottman @gregcottman]

@Hardywolf359 I really hope his last words were "Hold my beer... I got this!"