Gretchen

[Gretchen @gretchdog]

Him: she’s probably cheating on me
What she’s actually doing:

[Gretchen @gretchdog]

@ureverygirltome Wait but I kind of love a remember when conversation

[Gretchen @gretchdog]

Mark duplass … can you hear me mark duplass…

[Gretchen @gretchdog]

Incredibly painful watch… shame Gillis you will start to cough in 4 days

[Spencer Althouse @SpencerAlthouse]

oof...Shane Gillis's very awkward SNL opening monologue included him calling women whores for wearing shorts at the gym + an anecdote about using Joe Rogan's personal sauna, in which Theo Von said he "looked like a gas station egg"

he ended the monologue by saying "you're either gay or you're Hitler, and isn't that where we're at as a country?" which kinda confused the audience, so he literally had to say, "hey, that was the monologue, ladies and gentlemen"

here's the first joke: "I haven't been to the gym in so long. I didn't know women just dress like whores now. There's no other way to describe it. Have you seen the shorts? The wrinkles go, like, around the cheeks and all combine at the butthole. And don't look. You're not allowed to look."

[Gretchen @gretchdog]

Dunkin Punkin™️

[Gretchen @gretchdog]

I’m cryinggggg

[florian @blondeoblonde]

my situationship with another banger…

[SITA @raspberhrriies]

do you feel ashamed when you hear my name

[Gretchen @gretchdog]

I always say I’m never dating again then go on another date #glasshalffull #theresstillhope

[Gretchen @gretchdog]

Bout to annoy tf out of the guy I’m sitting next to on the Amtrak with my Chinese buffet takeout

[Gretchen @gretchdog]

I wish I had a British accent

[Gretchen @gretchdog]

@mblockenjoyer If you not basketball squirrel, then you dead…

[Gretchen @gretchdog]

Hey girl #twin

[Gretchen @gretchdog]

I have the same dress (and am wearing this dress tomorrow) as pink pantheress

[ophelia @ophoelia]

everyone wants to be y2k until you have to wear jeans under dress

[rené @thatsbuzzingme]

the lizards at petsmart when i tap on the glass

[Gretchen @gretchdog]

Pretty sure I got fired today #whatido

[Gretchen @gretchdog]

I need a little handheld to gnaw on

[Gretchen @gretchdog]

How it felt in film class at UVM

[dante @en7erthevoid]

Clímax (2018)
Gaspar Noé

[Gretchen @gretchdog]

Had a dream last night that Penelope Grace and I went to a Jon Bernthal one act play and he was a court jester essentially and really fuxked with us because we were front row

[ana @pelicinema]

this fucking clip