Grouchy Rabbit

Information for successful living.

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

SIGNS THAT THINGS AREN'T GOING SO WELL: When you close your eyes you see falling Tetris bricks. https://t.co/zdeno7YqED

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

FACT: When you take a long time in the bathroom at school, everybody knows you pooped. https://t.co/MgD6DJq3Mw

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

TIPS FOR SUCCESS: If someone you like tells you you're beautiful, tell them they are ugly. Opposites attract. https://t.co/YrdT7jk5v4

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

DEFINITION: Jeans (noun) - A substitute for napkins. https://t.co/aJ2MsMwsWc

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

DEFINITION: Toilet (noun) - Something that only clogs at a friend's house. https://t.co/CZNl77lvRc

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

FACT: Nudists are never attractive. https://t.co/dyajIUIt7m

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

TIPS FOR SUCCESS: If you can't win the argument, correct their grammar instead. https://t.co/PiWnYP1UwK

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

DEFINITION: Meaningless (adj) - A white crayon. https://t.co/WndKKqT1Vn

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

TIPS FOR SUCCESS: If the sign at a crosswalk shows a red hand, sprint immediately through traffic and high-five it b… https://t.co/o65sQGAe3u

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

REALIZED: ipod! upside down is still ipod! https://t.co/yqmapAzQzS

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

SIGNS THAT THINGS AREN'T GOING SO WELL: You're sitting in Sheldon Cooper's spot. https://t.co/9X5knoH42P

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

TIPS FOR SUCCESS: Always bring a gun to the bank. There could be a robbery. https://t.co/hMvdk6Cihq

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

REALIZED: Google must be a woman... It knows everything. https://t.co/hQ2Uj241cp

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

FACT: Cursive was invented for the sole purpose of writing your name in the snow with urine. https://t.co/RH3rhuk8vY

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

TIPS FOR SUCCESS: Never go to sleep angry. Instead, stay up all night and plot your revenge. https://t.co/kAL0FEkXqh

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

TIPS FOR SUCCESS: While being mugged, shout "Swiper no swiping!" https://t.co/8Lu7UOmPHE

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

REALIZED: The Amish will never read this. https://t.co/XWmwQHZl59

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

TO DO LIST: Choke a smurf. See what colour it turns. https://t.co/L7vQzfUL0o

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

DEFINITION: Awkward (adjective) - When two pedophiles meet up after chatting as 15 year olds online. https://t.co/WhEF1YChhF

[Grouchy Rabbit @grouchyrabbit]

DEFINITION: Liar (noun) - A person who claims they don't have any gum. https://t.co/UuWBEqY7i7