TheGroundsmansNephew

FPL enthusiast. 4x family mini league winner. Top 1k uk 2019. Top 600 uk 2020.

[TheGroundsmansNephew @groundsmans]

Just had a text off a former groundsman, apparently the kit man at Brentford has told me their keeper might be Flekken useless today. Said he cut his Flekken hand on a Flekken glass pouring a Flekken orange juice, and also had a tight calf in the warm up. Concerning in a word.

[TheGroundsmansNephew @groundsmans]

Favourite day of the season this, and it’s not close. Sat on a beach in Spain, drinking an estrella with, would you believe, the wife of Marc cucurella. He’ll be here soon, apparently he’ll be on the 17:35 easyJet out of East Midlands, don’t blame him, the largest cold here

[TheGroundsmansNephew @groundsmans]

@MattKettyle *title

[TheGroundsmansNephew @groundsmans]

Anyone else heard the walker injury rumours?

[TheGroundsmansNephew @groundsmans]

@MattKettyle Had a fall out with Ange after the city game. Ange said he’d never be good enough to win a tittle and reports are he’s out for 2 weeks with a bruised ego

[TheGroundsmansNephew @groundsmans]

Tell you who isn’t. @unofficialmuzz. Mount could injure himself whilst scoring an own goal and it wouldn’t dampen, what has been to date, one of the finest fpl seasons. His management this year has been a joy to behold. Sensational.

[Fantasy Premier League @OfficialFPL]

🔀 The most-transferred-in player for GW34 🔀

🔵 Mason Mount has amassed 41 #FPL points over his last 🖐 matches

Who's banking on another haul from the midfielder today? 🙋

#CHEWHU

[TheGroundsmansNephew @groundsmans]

Wasn’t planning on posting updates as I’m current enjoying 10 days in San Sebastian with the better half but I’ve just seen Harvey Barnes off his twat plastering the toilets in the o’flannagans by the hotel. Paella all down his top. Struggle to see him getting a start at wolves.

[TheGroundsmansNephew @groundsmans]

Hearing from other sources that it may have been “Rock, paper, scissors”. More news to follow.

[TheGroundsmansNephew @groundsmans]

Hearing reports that both Chilwell and Sancho lost a big game of 5s this morning and so have stayed at the hotel to look after the team dog. Unconventional policy from Southgate but you can’t knock his managerial record at major tournaments.

[TheGroundsmansNephew @groundsmans]

Had some bad information from multiple sources earlier. Tough scene. Won’t delete tweets. Will us as a reminder to be better. Thanks.

[TheGroundsmansNephew @groundsmans]

This just in, North Korea announcing expansion to its nuclear programme. South Korea responding with increased conscription. Son called up for military service. Wow. Lucas lined up to start in his place. Kim reportedly captained Lucas. Nobody could have seen this coming.

[TheGroundsmansNephew @groundsmans]

Hearing word that an angry and hungover Steve Bruce is submitting an all English XI in response to the UK’s woeful scoring last night in Eurovision. Poor implications for Dubravka’s chances of a clean sheet. All very Bizarre.

[TheGroundsmansNephew @groundsmans]

Heard from Mary in Wilmslow that Fernandes was walking with a limp in Church this morning. Has had bad information in the past. Known to overindulge in the communion wine but could be huge if true.

[TheGroundsmansNephew @groundsmans]

Word in that Trent was spotted in pop world last night with Dom solanke. Not a good look, Southgate will be unimpressed. Remains to be seen if Klopp knows.

[TheGroundsmansNephew @groundsmans]

Hearing that Bamford has overslept and was late for the bus this morning. Bielsa not happy. Unsure if he starts. #fplfinalday