Greg Sheffer

Cowboy at heart

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

guys above six foot will literally go out of their way to tell you how tall they are. u could be like "it's hot out" and they'll be like "yeah even hotter for me I'm 6'4 so I'm closer to the sun" like we get it Greg ur the MVP of ur intramural basketball team

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

a group of me & my
patriots in the siblings on
Boston harbor thanksgiving
🤝
spilling the tea

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

service dog I know I can’t pet: 👀

me: 👀

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

if u got ghosted recently remember at least it’s spooky season

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

really tryna date someone who doesnt like pickles so every time their lunch comes with a pickle on the side i can eat it

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

*me giving a ted talk* you ever just sit back and realize there’s deadass ppl who live in Wyoming

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

You ever workout and eat healthy for a week & realize you’d rather be a lil thick

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

i wish i was a guest at the royal wedding just so when something dramatic happened I could turn to the person sitting next to me & be like “now that’s some tea”

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

semester: over
titties: out

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

A Quiet Place (2018)

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

just minding my business at the family Easter brunch until my mom goes "tell me something i don't know" & my 5 yr old niece replies "Uncle greg wet the bed till he was 8!" like ok I thought we were passed that sis but go off I guess

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

@captainkalvis lmao

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

we need a Disney princess who gets dumped by a fuck boy and uses it as motivation to get into Harvard law school and graduate as valedictorian

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

yes I know this is the plot of legally blonde please bend and snap out of my mentions

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

Me: i could use a na-

Girl who used her parents money to spend an entire week blacked out in Cancun for spring break: nap? you mean a siesta amigo. the weather is soooo nice here in Mexico. wanderlust™💫 is a way of life, it's so so important to travel while ur still young

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

I can guarantee that any child who didn't cry when Mufasa died now has at least 2 felonies

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

*first date*
alright don't let them know I sometimes talk like an instagram meme account

date: im glad u picked this place I love sushi

me: LMFAOO me irl

date: wha-

me: it be like that sometimes

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

damn girl are you the new snapchat cause I don't really understand u & I miss the old you

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

@dondiegokass_ @kodykpelham11 @goldensoul21 @yinick @richardgierman @PalomaHansen i would like to thank everyone involved for the quality of this thread great work team

[Greg Sheffer @gsheffr]

*me during a test*
"alright focus, you got this"

my brain: https://t.co/VxekU6cIpb