haley 🦕

voted world's sleepiest girl by people magazine (she/her)

[Bodie @bodie9210472856]

Constantly saying “long story short” with absolutely no intention of shortening the story whatsoever

[ᴅᴏᴏᴍᴇɴɪᴄ @dinosaur_info]

however chill or not chill I seem now, I was way way more strict as a kid. I was in kindergarten avoiding kids who said “libary” because I thought they were incurably stupid

[M. @ayosznn]

may your “let me just try” work out beautifully.

[ci 𓅓 @cicireion]

unfortunately there’s nothing casual with me. i was made to feel like home.

[yimika| @yimikaaaa]

Whenever I catch myself not reading things completely, I remember anti-intellectualism is on the rise, literacy is in decline, and I don’t want to be a VICTIM!

[27. @dimvji]

i should've locked in when i was thirteen

[haley 🦕 @ha1eysaurus]

@h0rse4ever @__Nathal1a__ probably bc he used the term butch, which is used exclusively to describe lesbians, and lesbians generally don't want to hear about men being into them. & the danger lies in the possibility that this isn't a joke, rather a dykebreaking fetish, which is what ppl are scared of

[April @ReignOfApril]

Break into my home and stand over my bed with a bullhorn. I don’t want to miss a second.

[Helen Bolton 🖤 @hbolton]

Really is one of the best things about New York that anytime something really big happens and you feel like you just need to be around other people/yell/etc. you can just go outside your apartment and other people will be doing the same thing

[haley 🦕 @ha1eysaurus]

@chillextremist i'm 22 and i own 4 dr. pepper shirts and i love them all dearly

[cameron @IngmarBagman]

Gay ppl be like do you wanna come hang out with an immigration lawyer and a pornstar

[haley 🦕 @ha1eysaurus]

@maipochacco https://t.co/agOUvWcEOU

[haley 🦕 @ha1eysaurus]

i just wanna KNOW

[haley 🦕 @ha1eysaurus]

feeling doubt is in the top 5 worst emotional experiences

[femiiiiii. @femiiiszn]

i believe in re-reading and re-watching your favourite books & movies at different stages of your life. the plot never changes, but your perspective does.

[George Michael @GeorgeMichael]

I HAVE NEVER AND WILL NEVER APOLOGISE FOR MY SEX LIFE ! GAY SEX IS NATURAL, GAY SEX IS GOOD! NOT EVERYBODY DOES IT, BUT.....HA HA!

[wendell sandico @wendellsandico]

people who upload pictures of restaurant menus to google maps are our modern day saints

[haley 🦕 @ha1eysaurus]

@Victory4ever12 @xility_11 @Markymarkcuban i texted this exact phrase to my girlfriend yesterday to be funny lol

[Maletšemana @maletsemana]

You’ll be having the worst time of your life and someone will video call you

[Jeff Melnick @melnickjeffrey1]

I’m beginning to understand that many of you use the word “cancelled” to index the much more complex social process we used to call “falling out of favor”