Hadley Robinson

my dad told me “sarcasm is the last resort to a defeated wit” and I’ve changed it to “sarcasm is a five star resort that has safe, comfortable beds”

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

90% of life affirming quotes were written by authors who killed themselves in weird ways

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

there should be mandatory mattress burning ceremonies after breakups

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

deeply resent beauty’s impermanence

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

being 29 is an entire year of the sunday scaries

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

good dog is redundant

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

“I work in fashion but I really want to be a journalist!”

-How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, The Devil Wears Prada, 13 Going on 30.

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

miley was so right when she said it’s the climb

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

Who would like to start a petition with me to add more eraser at the end of pencils. This ratio has pissed me off since 1999.

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

Why does Harry Potter, Christmas and Ricola cough drops all make me feel the same thing

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

is the opposite of an outfit an infit and would an infit just be my pajamas

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

Someday they’ll look back and think lord of the rings was a religion we practiced

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

Mamma Mia theme park would be cool

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

People with blue eyes aren’t angry it’s just really bright out all the time

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

Anyone else put on hand lotion like they’re scheming something devious

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

It’s been a sit in the shower kind of day

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

Frequently have Ryan Gosling’s voice in my head asking me what I want and I’m sorry but it’s not that simple Ryan

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

Hell is probably a bunch of dudes revving their motorcycles way too loudly at each other

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

Update: when you buy a cookie for a friend but then eat the cookie because secretly you’re the “friend”

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

When you buy a cookie for a friend but then eat the cookie because they’ll never know

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

I want ppl to start taking the Twilight films seriously

[Hadley Robinson @hadleyrobinson_]

Calling grapefruits grapefruits is just lazy. If I was in charge of naming fruit I’d call them goldoblums. Or luminelons.