prof cheeseman

my life is a joke

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

i’ve got a touch of popcorn lung but it’s okay because it tastes nice

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

lightning mcqueen’s slogan if he went down a bad path -
“i am on speed”

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

frightening mcqueef would be a fantastic drag name

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

i’m going to go vape about this

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

i think ozempic is helping the adderall shortage

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

i have a theory that everyone remembers their first shirley temple

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

i only drink sometimes… but sometimes are more than others

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

my personality is so fun! also my tits.

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

luckily for me i’m too stupid to get trust issues because i just forget what happened

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

i’ll put my whole tongue in ur ass and i will not repent.

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

sorry, didn’t get the memo that i’m not supposed to be genuine

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

can you pls touch my bean of satisfaction

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

i’m honestly surprised they haven’t made watching soccer political yet

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

like a frog in boiling water… i love alcohol

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

i think i could stick a whole loofa up my ass, i’m not sure it would feel good tho

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

asking god if i should do this shot

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

the craziest people you know want to be therapists like damn if i had a therapist they would tell me to stay away from you

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

don’t talk to me until i’ve had my cocaine first

[prof cheeseman @haleymffb]

can i bum a lil kiss on the cheek