✨Hanz✨

what

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

Hot take: people who expect me to respond to their emails immediately are a problem. Emailing someone is not instant messaging them. If you want an immediate update, call me.

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

I know airport time isn’t real, but if you’re in line for a hotdog at 5:30a, I am passing judgement

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

@FlyTPA Your mom’s house

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

God gives his hottest soldiers his toughest battles

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

@FlyTPA Sorry that you don’t understand the fusion of comfort and high fashion (mine are cheetah print)

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

@therealDBcoop Don’t forget about Taylor to Olandria!!! The double standard is craaaazy

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

Overstimulated at the Florida DMV

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

Cannot wait to be insufferable at work tomorrow passing out valentines

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

@joeymonda And DEFINITELY do NOT play it backwards it will summon demons

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

Had a VERY vivid dream about this specific le creuset dish

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

I love the airport. In one ear, I’m listening to a couple break up (can’t tell whose side I’m on) and in the other ear is a man on FaceTime with his dog. What an absolute gift

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

Cheddar and sour cream ruffles make me feel emotions that I can’t explain

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

I’m built like that episode of SpongeBob where Squidward eats all those krabby patties

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

Just saw an ad for a “National Blowout Sale!” on literal houses and I am begging you can we please just normalize affordable housing

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

Siri, how do I tell my mom that she does not have to comment on every single TikTok I send her

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

When you buy a Tesla, do you sign a contract promising to ride the ass of every car you’re ever behind?

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

I just paid $20 for a single “sushi burrito” which sounded cool until I realized it’s literally just normal sushi with less work involved for the chef

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

How is it that the longest line in the airport is 9 times out of 10 the one I’m about to join?

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

What’s really tripping me up is that ‘the corporate world’ is literally made up. Like someone did that and we all followed. We are all cosplaying as employees indefinitely

[✨Hanz✨ @hannahmpage]

I stood up for something at work and now there’s a huge target on my back and I got a talking to to make sure “my loyalty lies with the company” And “that tone was inappropriate for work” (which it wasn’t, they just don’t like to be told they are wrong)