hancake

[hancake @hannahnrobo]

senior prom ✌🏼️

[colin @colindross]

Actually the cure to corona virus is injecting McDonalds sprite directly into the body

[LMR @thetangay]

“How are you doing?”
Me:

[Auntie @WisKanSass]

April distance brings May existence.

[Chase @chaselyons]

Coronavirus severely underestimates how long I can sit inside my house living off of nothing but caffeine and shredded cheese

[J Hooch @JardinTaylor]

Coronavirus is everywhere. BOOK THAT FLIGHT. Take that trip. You probably won’t die from it, but even if you do... You wanna die with the Eiffel Tower in the background, or you wanna die with I-20 in the background? You decide.

[hancake @hannahnrobo]

@gwendumouchel I gotchu boo

[hancake @hannahnrobo]

@gwendumouchel Do you need something sweetie

[. @SuiNeltwork]

It appears Shrek has snuck out of Universal Studios to our park. He is telling everyone the toilets go by "envelope rules," meaning you have to lick the seat for it to stay down. This is false. We don't go by envelope rules and we're trying to catch him. He's oddly fast as hell.

[Evan J. Worthen @harambevan]

Back home on the east coast I can drive for one hour and cross 2 state lines, pass 8 major metropolitan areas including the nation’s capital, and see 1000s of McMansions.

In Utah I can drive 5 hours in any direction and see 7 cows

[hancake @hannahnrobo]

@gwendumouchel Same tho

[Tony Starch @_CakeBawse]

It's been 6 months since I joined the gym and no progress. I'm going there in person tomorrow to see what's really going on.

[hancake @hannahnrobo]

@gwendumouchel Damn mami

[samantha @milkygoddess]

today has been awful somebody send me $800

[ellie schnitt @holy_schnitt]

I would like my fashion vibes at all times to be ‘wealthy heiress whose elderly husband died under mysterious (but unproven) circumstances’

[James @CaucasianJames]

too many times i’ve considered turning my twitter into a penguin fan account

[Satan @s8n]

If you’re having a bad day, just remember. You probably deserve it.