Hannah

duuuuuuuuude idk lol

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

I am 6’ tall but if I measured the same way men do, I’m actually 6’3”

[Obsessed with Death @obsessedeath]

Please share.

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

@fernetadette happy bernday home girl 🌻 hope today is as fun as you are 🤠

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

Drafting an email to tell my employer that due to the amount of work expected of me vs the amount I’m paid, it’s a little ~weird~ that I just have to keep showing up and doing it every day so I can live inside

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

I will now be answering “how are you” with what season of greys anatomy I’m rewatching for the 6th time.

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

Does anyone else watch TV and get sandwich jealous? Like dang, that sandwich looks really a lot like I would like to eat it

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

Having this conversation while watching greys anatomy. 2005 is alive and well.

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

@rabpetrillo

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

I turned 30 and the only difference I’ve noticed is that I’m more willing to make time for naps

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

@Tay_hern

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

I just spent 1.5 hours organizing pictures from my childhood and now I remember why they’ve been under my bed in weird livelaughlove boxes for two years. sleep well everyone 💕

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

I had to order a new pair of slippers and I’m experiencing genuine anxiety over the possibility of them feeling “scratchy.”

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

Just realized that when having to make or answer work calls, my brain just suggests any greeting or answer I heard my mom use when I was 7, and I am now permanently embarrassed.

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

@kellzz___ said “see you later, crocodile” as I was leaving the house at 9:45am (obviously I’m still upset about it, as intended). I’m v grateful to have people in my life that get me to my core, but I have to remind myself that some people use that for evil.

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

@Tay_hern

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

@Venmo #VenmoMe @Hannah-Oulman-1

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

The middle aged woman walking around the gym vibing this morning with a handful of snacks is my new role model

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

Went bowling today and was bested by a 9 year old. Yes, this happened in public and yes, I will hold on to this for years to come.

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

Me: hiding in my office from a 14 year old kid at work bc they are actively planning on ending my life

Also me: *chomping on pb pretzels*
I wonder what her enneagram is

[Glennon Doyle @GlennonDoyle]

please don't protest the laws we made about your bodies at our homes because our homes are private and they belong to us.

[Hannah @hannaphylactic]

On today’s episode of “Shit Kelli Said”: I have a [half] blind dog, you think I can’t communicate with disabled dogs??? I SPECIALIZE in double d’s

@kellzz___