harlotholla

just a humble doctor’s lawyer

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

I am a creature of habit, and all my habits are bad.

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

my favorite thing in the entire world is running into my bf’s entire family while buying monistat 👍🏻

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

a laser pointer but it kills spiders

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

My love language is being unyieldingly sarcastic until I feel bad and say one nice thing to you every other month

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

Watching somebody pack American Spirits really stresses me out.

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

if anyone needs me I’ll be snuffling taco bell in the parking lot outside my cpr class

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

@JayBauman1 #feminism

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

I'm only 1 vodka tonic and 2 Ashlee Simpson music videos deep and already i'm considering dressing like hot topic and claire's hellspawn lovechild again

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

@mametown I didn’t mean to do this but

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

I don’t know what bullet journaling is but I just spent $50 on it

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

@clintstevensTV Str8 pert

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

I've never felt less together and more supported

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

It's not that hard to just be happy for people

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

@nat_delautre To happen this summer*

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

just got carded at a movie theater god help the 17-year-old that looks like this

[mike ginn @shutupmikeginn]

I love being a pessimist because when bad shit happens I get to be right, and when good shit happens hey that's good shit I'll take it

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

if you give me a window, i'll bulldoze the house

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

I'm a humanitarian. I only eat humans.

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

Happy derby day https://t.co/zYOKrEymKR

[mike ginn @shutupmikeginn]

The haunting messages of ancient cave paintings still ring true thousands of years later:

HORSES

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

oh man I'm so excited to fuck up my life tomorrow #dramatic

[harlotholla @harlotholla]

can I plz just want hotdogs without being seen as some kind of sexual predator