@WhitStillman I saw Damsels in Distress in the cinema with my mum and she laughed when one of the girls said 'And not even the right side', talking about the Cathar guy. 😟
Somewhere along the way, the concept of psychological safety underwent concept creep. People started to say they were unsafe if another person disagreed with them. They started to say that safe environments meant ones where everyone talked the same way, thought the same way and never ever joked or teased.
People started, in short, to equate safety with a total lack of challenge. Being a safe person meant signing up to an unspoken code of conduct. Never speaking up or ask awkward questions. A safe space meant one where everyone had to keep to the rules and Be Kind.
But true psychological safety comes from knowing that you can tolerate disagreement. It comes from knowing that people can have different views, and they may challenge you…and you’ll be safe enough anyway. It comes from knowing that you can express what you think, and you won’t be shunned or kicked out.
True psychological safety comes when we are not afraid of discomfort, not when we try to eliminate it.
Let’s stop pretending otherwise.
The secrets of the Men's Health and Male Suicide prevention space:
I’ll be honest, having peered behind the curtain of the online 'Men's Health space' for some years now, there’s a lot to be said about integrity - or lack of.
Below are all true stories, about people you likely know, who I’ve never publicly called out...
(1) One guy is a world famous suicide prevention advocate, and is the darling of the UK mental health space - I saw him screaming and berating an Apple customer service worker down the phone, because they couldn't fix his broken laptop fast enough.
And I don't mean a stern word, I mean, full on yelling, swearing, screaming... etc
(2) Another person I once knew, is a self proclaimed ‘world famous’ MRA who talks explicitly about the dangers of false allegations – yet two years ago, she tried to start a rumor that I was a pedophile, and broadcast it out to 100,000 people.
(3) A mutual friend, who is another well known advocate for men, was appalled at what she did... but refused to call her out, or support me, because of “business” reasons.
(3) Some other bloke, who I no longer talk to either, endlessly bangs on about his "dream" of emptying his charity coffers, and closing it all down in the name of helping men - but he’s quietly sitting on nearly half a million in cash donations, and not spending it.
(4) Another similar charity claims to hold “talk groups for men”, but I know that their groups are all empty, have been for years, that nobody turns up, but he keeps collecting donations anyway.
These are just a few top-of-my-head stories of the people I've met, which are, by far, the most demoralising part of this space.
No.
It's not the angry feminist mobs who call me [insert insult], but rather, those who claim to help men and boys, who hoover up all the good will and funding, and then do nothing with it.
Or worse, they use it to destroy others in this space.
Nothing is more demoralising than that.
@SarahTheHaider I think people are fixed on the gender stereotypes, that women have a non-violent nature whereas men are wild animals unless you train them not to be.
A smart person I know once observed that most people involved in socialist politics are well-meaning lefties who want a fairer world. But a few of them, disproportionately represented in the ranks of those who gain power and influence, are really just in it for the gulags.
@Nerdrotics@estherckrakue And put Russell T Davies in a bin so that he can’t have Hugh Laurie confront his ‘unconscious bias’ against aliens or something.