Top Tweets for #ConlonQuotes
what are the odds that all my friends forget what i look like and start to remember me as a hotter version of myself? #conlonquotes
“Why go to a drag show when you can go to a guard show?” #conlonquotes
"I'm used to seeing men in spandex cause guard but I'm not used to seeing straight men in spandex" #ConlonQuotes
Conlon: "A woman's place is in the house and the senate"
Me: "Wow that was profound. Can I tweet that?"
Conlon: "Sure but I saw it on a t-shirt"
#ConlonQuotes
"Usually it shoots right out of the kitchen and then it shoots right out of you" -Conlon talking about Mexican restaurants #ConlonQuotes
“Did you know sour cream is just lunch flavored yogurt?” #ConlonQuotes
“Did you know raisins are just grapes that didn’t get picked for wine so they shrivel up because they’re sad?” #ConlonQuotes
"If I had known you then, I would have cyber bullied you" #ConlonQuotes
““A prop is nothing more than challenge ready to be conquered.” -Jeff Hurr” -Conlon Griesmer #conlonquotes #blooINDOOR
“why are you unbuckling?! i’m passionate about seatbelts.” #conlonquotes
"UPS asked me to measure my package" *laughs to self* "It's 12 inches by 12 inches. That's some girth" #ConlonQuotes
"It got freaking cold overnight. My nipples were not prepared" #ConlonQuotes
"I wish I was an empty truck. Empty trucks don't have to do fall shows" #ConlonQuotes
Topic: #TheBachelorette
Conlon: "I feel like if I was on this show, I would become a meme"
@_maddie_af: "Conlon, you're already a meme"
#ConlonQuotes
“Big dick energy? Meh. Big heart energy? OH YEAH!” #ConlonQuotes
“Think about it, we’re on the dance floor. At least FOUR children have been conceived right here!” #ConlonQuotes
"Why am I not listening to #Africa by #Toto right now? What am I even doing with my life?" #ConlonQuotes
"I'm having a bad hair day. No wait, I'm having a bad hair life. Tweet that." #ConlonQuotes
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