Top Tweets for #SheHejdl
"Do you like this on me?"
"Always."
"I've never worn it before."
"I like it now."
"No, you don't."
"How do you know?"
"You didn't say you like it on me."
"But I did."
"Not before I asked."
"I can never win with you."
"It's not a contest."
But it was.
It is. #SheHejdl
"Do you like this on me?"
"You know I do."
"I've never worn it before."
"So I like that on you now."
"Nope."
"How do you know?"
"You didn't say you like it on me."
"But I did."
"Not before I asked."
"I can never win with you."
"It's not a contest."
But it was. It is.
#SheHejdl
"You like this on me?"
"Always."
"I've never worn it before."
"Okay. I like it now."
"No, you don't."
"How do you know?"
"You didn't say you like it on me."
"But I did."
"Not before I asked."
"I can never win with you."
"It's not a contest."
But it was. It always is.
#SheHejdl
"There aren't any weekends in nature," he said.
"So let's do something unnatural," she said.
"Like what?"
"Let's go see a movie."
"A movie!"
"There aren't any movies in nature."
They went to a movie.
They held hands.
They ate popcorn.
There is no popcorn in nature.
#SheHejdl
"What was I doing?"
"That."
"What's that?"
"What you were doing."
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"There. Great. You did it again."
"I did what again?"
"That."
Whatever it was he loved about her, she kept doing it, though she never did learn what it was.
#SheHejdl
"You're a mystery to me," he said.
"Good," she said.
"I don't understand you at all."
"Good."
"I can't tell what you're going to do from one moment to the next."
"Good," she said.
"I don't know if you're good for me or bad for me."
"Good," she said.
"Good," he said.
#SheHejdl
"What time are we due there?"
"Whenever."
"Whenever isn't a time."
"Whenever is any time."
"But you're the one who made the appointment."
"To do what?"
"Plan our wedding!"
"Whenever."
Which is exactly why their marriage didn’t last beyond its appointed time.
#SheHejdl
"Are you a thinking or a feeling person?"
"A neither person."
"What's a neither person?"
"Neither here nor there. Neither this nor that. Neither good nor bad."
"Neither you nor Larry."
"Who's Larry?"
"My other former boyfriend.
"Former?"
"Yes. Neither now nor later."
#SheHejdl
"Do you like this on me?"
"You know I do."
"I've never worn it before."
"I like it on you now."
"No, you don't."
"How do you know?"
"You didn't say you did."
"Yes I did."
"Not before I asked."
"I can never win with you."
"It's not a contest."
But it was. It always is.
#SheHejdl
LOOKING FOR LOVE
"Here."
"There?"
"Here."
"Where?"
"There."
"Here?"
"Here."
"Here?"
"Yes."
"Yes?"
"Yes."
"Here?"
"No."
"Where?"
"There."
"Here?"
"Go."
"Where?"
"There."
"There?"
"There."
"Where?"
"Away."
He went away, never having found his way with her.
#SheHejdl
"I don't care."
"I don't care, either."
"I don't care more than you don't care."
"How do you know that?"
"Who cares?"
"I do."
"See, you do care."
"But I don't."
"But you just said you do."
"Who cares what I said?"
"I do."
They're married. They care and they don't care.
#SheHejdl
"What's on TV?" he said.
"Nothing."
"Nothing?"
"Nothing."
"There are a godzillion channels."
"I think you mean 'gazillion.'"
"Don't tell me what I mean."
"Ok."
"What's on TV?"
"Here. Watch this."
She walked out the bedroom door and closed it behind her. One last time.
#SheHejdl
"Let me help you with that."
"Thanks."
"It was nothing."
"The mere fact that you offered..."
"How could I not?"
"Will you do it again?"
"If you ask me to."
"Give me your number."
He did.
She called.
He helped her many times after that, until the day one of them died.
#SheHejdl
"You'll never do it?"
"Never."
"If I close my eyes?"
"That makes no sense."
"You want me to stay?"
"For what?"
"For you to do it."
"I told you I--"
--never do it."
"Correct."
"Okay. I'll do it."
"You will?"
"Yes."
"Great! Do it!"
He did it.
She didn't close her eyes.
#SheHejdl
"It shouldn't be long now."
"How long?"
"Don't know."
"We really need him to come."
"It shouldn't be long now."
"You said that before."
"I know."
"He's not coming, is he?"
"He never has."
"And he never will."
"Let's wait anyway."
"Yes. Let's wait."
What else can we do?
#SheHejdl
"Our relationship isn't one. It's an experiment. We're scientists in the lab of love."
"To prove what?"
"Nothing. We always end up making love on the floor."
"That sounds like a relationship to me."
"Let's experiment."
Don't look down. You might trip over them.
#SheHejdl
“I’ve got a secret.”
“What?"
"That's it."
“Your secret is that you have a secret?”
“Yup."
"My secret's better.”
“What?”
“I’ve done something very bad.”
"What is it?"
“That’s it.”
“What’s it?”
“I’ve done something very bad.”
“But what?”
“That’s my other secret.”
#SheHejdl
"I can't take it any longer."
"Me, neither."
"Do you think we should...break up?"
"When?"
"Whenever we're ready."
"You ready?"
"You first."
"Not fair."
"Well, I'm certainly not going first."
"I guess we're not ready."
"Guess not."
Guess what?--they're still together.
#SheHejdl
"Mind if I sit here?"
"Please do."
"Did you know him?"
"Not personally. You?"
"No. I just wanted to be sure."
"That he's dead, right?"
"Right."
"What are you doing after the funeral?"
"Smiling."
"May I join you?"
"Please do."
#SheHejdl
"You like my dress?"
"Sure."
"So?
"So?
"Stop stalling."
"I'm not stalling--I'm looking."
"What do you see?"
"I see you."
"And the dress?"
"I see only you. Too beautiful for any dress. Including that one."
That dress became her all-time favorite dress. His, too.
#SheHejdl
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