Top Tweets for #SignsYouAreGettingOld
If you're a meteorologist I will follow you. #signsyouaregettingold
When did they allow so many 18 year olds to become doctors? Both my new doc and my dentist look like teenagers to me. ๐
#SignsYouAreGettingOld
I just said to my wife upon returning from a walk with the dog: "oh good, we're home in time for @Jeopardy !" #signsyouaregettingold.
You feel a tinkle coming on and then a minute later you're dancing around like a 5-year-old, smashing your crotch like a stress ball, looking around for an acceptable place where people won't judge you too badly for being an adult peeing in public. #SignsYouAreGettingOld
when you research judges on the ballot instead of voting for funny names #signsyouaregettingold
When you turn down the radio volume while driving in order to see better... #SignsYouAreGettingOld
#SignsYouAreGettingOld You choose to eat congee and porridge even though youโre not sick.
#SignsYouAreGettingOld You sleep late one night and pay for it for the rest of the week.
Drink more water, they said. Donโt dehydrate while #WFH, they said.
What they didnโt tell you: You will be spending a lot of time peeing too, especially if youโre above 50.
#signsyouaregettingold
#SignsYouAreGettingOld You canโt sing the song Sandy from Grease in John Travoltaโs original key anymore. https://t.co/BuY4fjgwW8
#SignsYouAreGettingOld You have an unhealthy obsession with buying light bulbs. The brighter the better. (The Philips LED 19W E27 3000K bulb is your current favourite.)
#SignsYouAreGettingOld: You try to drink the last few drops of your after-dinner coffee and you completely miss your lips. And the coffee ends up dribbling down your chin and onto the table.
#signsyouaregettingold
Searched for my reading glasses for ten minutes. Found a spare pair and when I put them on I realized the other pair was on my head. ๐คฆโโ๏ธ๐คฆโโ๏ธ
After watching the original 101 Dalmatians about 101 times in the past month:
Me to kids: Can we watch the "new" 101 Dalmatians? I've never seen it before. It has real dogs.
Queue it up and realize it was released in 1996.
#SignsYouAreGettingOld
#signsyouaregettingold Two pillows is too high for you to sleep on now. But one pillow is too low.
#signsyouaregettingold You will only pee and poop at home or at the super clean office toilet. But your body does not always wait for you when youโre outdoors.
#signsyouaregettingold You panic because you thought you forgot to bring something important, then you check your bag and it's there. Then you panic AGAIN because you thought you forgot something else, you check and it's there too. So basically you forgot that you remembered.
#signsyouaregettingold You finish your food at the coffee shop, stand up, grab the glass mug of unfinished Teh C Kosong Peng, and proceed to walk away with it. #doh
#signsyouaregettingold You prefer to look at Instagram with your iPad because the pictures and words are bigger.
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