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BEAR MARKETS: HISTORY’S MOST BRUTAL LOSSES The S&P 500’s worst meltdown? The 2007–2009 financial crisis — a savage 57% nosedive in 17 months, followed by a 49-month recovery where optimism died and avocado toast got blamed for everything. The longest bear? 1973–1974 dragged on for 21 months and wiped out 48% of value, then took a ridiculous 69 months to recover — that’s 6 years of staring at red charts and questioning life choices. Then came the dot-com bust: from 2000 to 2002, stocks crashed 49% over 31 months. Investors learned two things: Pets .com was not the future, and “buy the dip” doesn’t work if the dip never ends. Not all bears hibernate — 2020’s COVID crash was short but nasty: a 34% drop in just 1 month. Markets bounced back in 5 months, fueled by stimulus checks and the sudden discovery that stocks don’t need logic. Most recently, 2022’s bear market gave us a 25% drop over 9 months, thanks to inflation, interest rates, and vibes. It recovered in 15 months, just in time for everyone to pretend they “bought the dip.” Source: Statista