Zach Bryan Crooked Teeth comes on and Cody says “just so you know, since it’s our anniversary, I would kill somebody for you. Blow somebody’s knees out and crooked their teeth for you.”
…
so much violence but why is it also sweet?? 🤣🤣
Cody always refers to flashing yellow lights as “blinky lights” so when giving me directions he’ll say “take a right at the blinky lights” and idk why but I find it hilarious and adorable coming out of his mouth 🤣😭🚦
I just transplanted half of my banana into Lennox’s empty banana peel because she wanted more banana but did not want my peel she wanted her peel so that was fun
Cody tells me every so often after a long day or when we’re just sitting in comfortable silence that I am a “calming presence” & it is just the best compliment I have ever received. I’m so glad I comfort him like he comforts me. 🥺❣️
hello to my fellow dog parents, it’s that time of year again! I’m vacuuming 4 times a day, mopping at least 2. I shake my sheets every morning and vacuum that fucker while I’m at it. I wipe off muddy paws 6 times a day. I’m not okay & neither are you. It’s okay to not be okay.🐾
I wasn’t looking to get my heart broken today but Haley decided to tell me that Lennox randomly gets sad & when she asks her what’s wrong she says “Butt & Cody still love me right?”
so I will simply be sobbing for the next week if anybody needs me
I had two raspberry mules with dinner and they were delicious so I asked for another with an extra shot of vodka and the bartender freaked on the waitress “maybe idk how to do my fucking job??” and I’m over here like no bitch maybe I just like vodka??? 😭😭
I guess I didn’t realize tonight was notorious for getting drunk. I gotta save that shit for tomorrow. No way can I be hungover or sober & listen to uncle Jon tell me about how ugly I was as a child, & how glad he is I finally “grew out of that” 🥴 cheers🍻
My toxic trait is eating literally the whole bagel/donut/apple/banana/cupcake/sandwich except for one bite & saying “I’m full” & throwing a teeny tiny minuscule bite to the dogs or in the trash like??? seriously