Hayden

🤬🤗☠️

[Yung Social Construct @yungscapegoat]

this Cunty Nut

[bird solidarity @future_liz]

Jennifer Lopez was so kind to let them borrow this from her personal collection

[Jamie Bonkiewicz @JamieBonkiewicz]

What time is the fake assassination attempt on July 4?

[culture @notgwendalupe]

20 years ago, the Cheetah Girls sounded a mess in Good Morning America:

[Hayden @haydanosaur]

Blonde women cluck @trixiemattel @katya_zamo

[Hayden @haydanosaur]

Why are military operations named like Axe body spray titles? Epic Fury….Desert Storm…

[Eric Hovagim @EricHovagim]

yo @SenSchumer whip out the pen. it's strongly worded letter time

[Eric Goldman @TheEricGoldman]

“Listen up, non-A-List members, an A-List member is speaking!”

[Hayden @haydanosaur]

I’m so glad Spotify Wrapped and Instagram didn’t exist when I was in high school. I would have to show my top 50 songs were all the glee cast?!?

[Hayden @haydanosaur]

@broadwaybabyto Just cancelled Paramount+!

[Hayden @haydanosaur]

@TinyTurkey616 “You will never hear my song again“ was an all-time line from Payakan for me

[Meg @megannn_lynne]

PLEASE stop asking me about Christmas plans. I have Big City job! I wear stilettos! I have a proposal due on December 25th! The only breaks I’ll be taking are for coffee. Maybe at the new St. Nick’s Sweets & Sips that just opened…I hope it isn’t run by a hunk who loves Christmas

[Hayden @haydanosaur]

Absolute ass - bragging about hiring less people then ever to do work. This is one of the biggest companies in the world. They’re bragging about spending less money to create advertising while charging consumers the same….more profits straight to the C Suite.

[DiscussingFilm @DiscussingFilm]

Coca-Cola’s annual Christmas advert is AI-generated again this year.

The company says they used even fewer people to make it — “We need to keep moving forward and pushing the envelope… The genie is out of the bottle, and you’re not going to put it back in”

[Allen Strickland Williams @TotallyAllen]

I don't think we need two-factor authorization to sign up for Jersey Mike's rewards program. I think we can play that one a little loose.

[Chase Passive Income @chasedownleads]

My son just told me he’s gay

I burst into tears

But not for the reason you think

You see, I understand that statistically, men earn about 20% more than women

Marrying a man instead of a woman is simply a wise long-term financial decision

So proud of my son ❤️

[Governor Newsom Press Office @GovPressOffice]

TRUMP JUST FLED THE PODIUM WITH PUTIN — NO QUESTIONS, NOTHING! TOTAL LOW ENERGY. THE MAN LOOKED LIKE HE’D JUST EATEN 3 BUCKETS OF KFC WITH VLAD. IS HE AFRAID THE PRESS WILL ASK ABOUT ME??? (AMERICA’S FAVORITE GOVERNOR) AND THE FACT I "STOLE THE CAMERAS" THIS WEEK WITH “THE MAPS”? MANY PEOPLE ARE SAYING HE BEGGED PUTIN TO HOLD HIS HANDS (TINY) ON THE WAY OUT. ADMIT IT, DONNIE J… YOU’RE TERRIFIED BECAUSE THIS WAS THE WORST WEEK OF YOUR LIFE BECAUSE OF ME, GAVIN C. NEWSOM. “THE MAPS” WILL END YOUR PRESIDENCY, RETAKE CONGRESS FOR THE PEOPLE, AND EXPOSE YOUR RIGGED "LITTLE GAME." MY "PERFECT MAPS" ARE MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN ANYTHING IN TRUMP TOWER (WHICH MANY SAY SMELLS WEIRD). @STEVENCHUENG47 — EXPLAIN THIS DISASTER!!! ENJOY YOUR FLIGHT HOME, DONALD — YOU’RE PUTIN’S PROBLEM NOW. I’M AMERICA’S SOLUTION. — GCN

[Governor Newsom Press Office @GovPressOffice]

DONALD “TACO” TRUMP, AS MANY CALL HIM, “MISSED” THE DEADLINE!!! CALIFORNIA WILL NOW DRAW NEW, MORE “BEAUTIFUL MAPS,” THEY WILL BE HISTORIC AS THEY WILL END THE TRUMP PRESIDENCY (DEMS TAKE BACK THE HOUSE!). BIG PRESS CONFERENCE THIS WEEK WITH POWERFUL DEMS AND GAVIN NEWSOM — YOUR FAVORITE GOVERNOR — THAT WILL BE DEVASTATING FOR “MAGA.” THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER! — GN

[Hayden @haydanosaur]

Someone should’ve double checked their homework before hitting submit.

[Hayden @haydanosaur]

@Alphafox78 Yes - the water is supposed to be on the outside of the boat. Easy to spot.

[Hayden @haydanosaur]

Maybe the brain microplastics are the friends we made along the way

[AFP News Agency @AFP]

Tiny shards of plastic called microplastics have been detected accumulating in human brains, but there is not yet enough evidence to say whether this is doing us harm, experts have said.
https://t.co/AilNFvJvez