Henry Block

Simply… Henry | contrib @theonion

[Henry Block @hblock99]

My wife, she’s what they call a bisexual. Every time I come home and see who’s in bed with her it’s like a gender reveal party. It’s a boy! It’s a girl! It’s twins. I tell ya…I get no respect. I may as well be a bisexual too seeing as I said bye to getting sexual a long time ago

[Henry Block @hblock99]

I feel like kids should have to send out an email blast to let everyone know when they start forming long-term memories

[union person @CantEverDie]

onion article from 3 hours ago

[Henry Block @hblock99]

My sense of empathy is so heightened it can guide me through the darkness like echolocation

[Henry Block @hblock99]

This cafe has a sign explaining what a banana is

[Henry Block @hblock99]

Kelly Clarkson SLAMS Metropolitan Museum For Refusing To Sell Her 4,000-Year-Old Egyptian Sarcophagus

[Henry Block @hblock99]

Are escape rooms immersive theatre? Your answer to this question tells me everything I need to know about your politics

[Henry Block @hblock99]

Sorry I can’t, I’m watching my figure. Watching it get bigger!!!!! Pass the pizza! 🤩😋👍

[Henry Block @hblock99]

My husband just said he wants to "go open".... Uhhh you can go open the door to the living room, cause your ass is sleeping on the couch!

[Henry Block @hblock99]

It's the ten-year anniversary of when my husband died during the Iraq War. He choked on a Six Flags funnel cake in 2006.

[Henry Block @hblock99]

Ugh my death doula just showed up with a bunch of board games

[Henry Block @hblock99]

Post-Parton depression :(

[Henry Block @hblock99]

It’s an I-eat-dog world out there.

[Henry Block @hblock99]

Omg my friends and I are all lowkey developing a huge crush on our captor 🙈

[Henry Block @hblock99]

@leeeeeeyummm Yup.

[Henry Block @hblock99]

Cannabis? Uhhh can a bis get some weed around here!? 🤣

[Henry Block @hblock99]

I’m sort of like the mom of this family

[Henry Block @hblock99]

Strait of Hormuz? More like GAY of Hormuz! Cause this gay WHORE MOOS when you milk his prostate!

[Henry Block @hblock99]

What could I possibly have to say about this subject

[gino @bodycrave]

why is no one talking about how pink kit connor’s nipples are

[Henry Block @hblock99]

Judge Judy executioner

[Henry Block @hblock99]

This show makes me feel like the family dog watching humans have a conversation