dis sma’s house

says yes

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

I was frustrated in traffic today until I saw the guy next to me had the apparatus for an entire hot air ballon strapped to the back of his SUV. How frustrating the traffic must have been for him.

[Ann Coulter @AnnCoulter]

Good news for George Herbert Walker Bush: As of today, he is no longer the biggest wimp ever to serve as President of the United States.

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

But say it with a lisp https://t.co/8BNuxpKHyH

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

@graceem_allen Who is paying you to say this?

[ClickHole @ClickHole]

Huge Win: Norway Has Reduced All Of Its Numbers By 97% https://t.co/L4WiyfZP70

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

Growing up is learning that there is a right time and a wrong time to try to open a can with one hand

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

“That’s what you’re telling all elevator doors in America, that they don’t matter. They should just keep it to themselves because if they try to close you’re just going to keep them open anyway.”

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

(Elevator door closes)
Sen. Flake: Wow they put me in a tough position. I just, I didn’t know what I was supposed to do.

Elevator door: Oh yeah that must’ve SUCKED for you........

[CNN @CNN]

Women confront Sen. Jeff Flake after he says he'll vote yes to Kavanuagh: “That’s what you’re telling all women in America, that they don’t matter. They should just keep it to themselves because if they have told the truth you’re just going to help that man to power anyway.”

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

A day in the life helpin out the homies

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

This guy is “doesn’t know there’s a twitter trend where you say “I’m _____ years old”” years old

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

@graceemoore12 @JordanLRice 😂😂😂where do you get this stuff!!!

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

@_anna_rogers_ Hmm

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

@OttoP20 what are you showing off for back to school?!

[Fanta @fanta]

Whether it’s fashion, clothes, or makeup it’s fun to show off your own personal style! What are you showing off for back to school? #FlavorOutLoud #WantaFanta

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

@chaindawgg Congrats! “Boy Who Wears Makeup” is the most universally-recognized nickname a person can have at Lipscomb

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

The possibility that they discontinue Crocs upsets me

then

I imagine how those turtles must feel.

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

Becoming one with nature means using the black screen of the iPhone as a mirror instead of using the camera

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

@theErinmylungs Ok.

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

Illinois? No, I’M annoyed.

[dis sma’s house @HearniaSam]

Jesus Christ I’m glad I don’t have to resemble a martyr https://t.co/03eNbORPp2