Underwater pharmacist

In bed by 9pm and that's the most exciting part of my day.

[Underwater pharmacist @helloimdreyfus]

@MountainDew 474

[Underwater pharmacist @helloimdreyfus]

@DJarrett180 Dick

[Underwater pharmacist @helloimdreyfus]

Hello, is this thing on? 😬

[rob delaney @robdelaney]

Just farted while my wife & I were watching Miami Vice (the movie) & a little bit later she said “Please don’t make those smells while I’m watching Colin.”

[Underwater pharmacist @helloimdreyfus]

@StLouisBlues well good thing the rep at scottrade was rude and hung up on me

[Underwater pharmacist @helloimdreyfus]

@scooper22 jokes on you because I (finally) got one

[Underwater pharmacist @helloimdreyfus]

@DJarrett180 shoulda went to college

[rob delaney @robdelaney]

Are you excited about the new Star Wars trailer?
I don't have that luxury; Obama wants to take my guns.

[Underwater pharmacist @helloimdreyfus]

Each new life, no matter how fragile or brief, forever changes the world. Happy birthday.

[rob delaney @robdelaney]

Having a party? Don't forget the cheese stuffed elf assholes!

[Underwater pharmacist @helloimdreyfus]

@scooper22 do it

[Underwater pharmacist @helloimdreyfus]

Dear Adam Scott lets get married

[Michael Gary Scott, Dunder Mifflin (Parody) @Da_MichaelScott]

Hi, I'm date Mike. Nice to meet me. How do you like your eggs in the morning?

[Underwater pharmacist @helloimdreyfus]

@_GreatSantini_ somebody's not getting laid tonight

[Underwater pharmacist @helloimdreyfus]

I would rather stab myself in the eye than communicate with my ex

[Underwater pharmacist @helloimdreyfus]

@DJarrett180 I'm too old to go there anyway

[Underwater pharmacist @helloimdreyfus]

@DJarrett180 ughhh

[Underwater pharmacist @helloimdreyfus]

@DJarrett180 TBS? Where?

[Underwater pharmacist @helloimdreyfus]

4am JITB run >>>>>>