herardo

Bio deals poison-elemental damage

[herardo @herardomoreno]

Why is “Get Busy” by Sean Paul on the starbucks playlist?

[jim @jimtropolis]

she lemony on my snicket until there’s an unfortunate event

[herardo @herardomoreno]

Who gave me $5 Kohls cash for Christmas?!? 😭😭😭

[herardo @herardomoreno]

Roommate bought the new Taylor album and you know I’m flexing it on Instagram like it’s mine.

[herardo @herardomoreno]

Accidentally liking something on the venmo feed is embarrassing.

[herardo @herardomoreno]

My Uber driver is out here performing illegal moves on the freeway and I’m tipping him extra for it.

[. @ElsieKFisher]

Just gained craaaaaazy exp

[herardo @herardomoreno]

Moonfall was so bad. I loved it.

[herardo @herardomoreno]

Wordle 230 3/6

⬛⬛🟩⬛🟩
⬛🟩🟩⬛🟩
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

[herardo @herardomoreno]

Christmas came early, in the form of a Wetzels Pretzels food truck outside my apartment.

[herardo @herardomoreno]

@ShannonHorannon WITH ARMS WIDE OPEN
UNDER THE SUNLIGHT
WELCOME TO THIS PLACE
ILL SHOW YOU EVERYYYYTHING

[herardo @herardomoreno]

I’m really out here listening to Creed

[herardo @herardomoreno]

People that only use the crushed ice option are maniacs.

[herardo @herardomoreno]

@TheBigDaddyP @DojaCat

[herardo @herardomoreno]

@TheBigDaddyP Sorry I belong to Jesus

[herardo @herardomoreno]

@TheBigDaddyP Can’t find my size at Victoria’s Secret and the employees always suck at measuring

[herardo @herardomoreno]

I’m upset that there’s dudes way chubbier than me with way less boob. This isn’t fair.

[BAKOON @BAKKOOONN]

using the power of the blockchain we have developed a new firework that is hundreds of times more distressing to dogs than the standard fourth of july firecracker. weve got the hound destroyer mortar system, collie panic attack inducing pinwheels and “the corgi nuke”

[the government man @me_irl]

the dominos pizza tracker says alfred is quality checking my order but alfred also made it. isn't this a conflict of interest