8-year-old Sharifa told me in #Kabul that she wasn't afraid when she lost her leg in a #Taliban attack on her village 4 months ago. When I asked her what she is afraid of now, she replied, "Not being allowed back to school," adding she dreams of becoming a doctor. @cbsnews
If you see me swerving on the road, I'm sorry. I am coordinating a dance to my current favorite jam while holding my chai tea latte and driving with my knee. If it gets out of hand, call the police.
The office printers and I are constantly in conflict. Today I threatened, yet again, to throw one out the window.
"You can't, it saves us money on ink" - coworker
"But its COSTING me my patience" - me
"But we can AFFORD that." - coworker.
Touche.
I'm just a:
⚪️ man
⚪️ woman
🔘 bill
Yes, I’m only a:
⚪️ man
⚪️ woman
🔘 bill
And I’m:
⚪️ standing in front of a girl
⚪️ standing in front of a guy
🔘 sitting here on Capitol Hill
I guess the Jonas brothers are back together but when were they not together? They’re literal brothers. They can’t stop being the Jonas brothers, they’re related by blood. How did America miss this?
Ever feel like you’re actually an adult then you find yourself on your lunch break drinking frozen grape juice from a “Wasting away again in margaritaville” cup, eating Chef Boyardee from a Starbucks mug and eating chocolate chip cookies your cousin made for you? Nah me neither.
I like to think I’m a decently normal person and then I have terrible dreams where I’m making home made leather conditioner in which I can’t remember that the third and final ingredient is lard. Like, what?
My boss is an avid twenty one pilots fan. He just went to one of their concerts & is now jamming to their music in the office. My boss is also my dad so he also jams out to them at home. I can't say I'm an avid fan but I'm now an avid listener.