beads

[john playful @johnplayful]

Was texted by an unknown number. Thank you to the group chat for the reply ideas

[Washingtons ghost @washghost1]

That’s when you just throw everything out

[g @34rths]

Taking my big thoughts to big places so they feel small

[Ajax1945 🏵️🇩🇰 - Mæth logh scal man land byggiæ @Ajax19451]

@abs_sweetmarie

[caught hantavirus on a swingers cruise @abs_sweetmarie]

Really one of the GOAT tweets of this website.

[Simpsons Quotes @QuotesSimpsons1]

I want the most intelligent Hamster you've got.

This little guy writes mysteries under the name of J.D. MacGregor.

How can a hamster write mysteries?

Well, he gets the ending first. Then he works backward.

Aw, come on.

Look, kid, just take him before his mother eats him.

[beads @hotchocmarsh]

@Puppieslover AI

[beads @hotchocmarsh]

@WembyAlienEra danny’s just trying to get attention

[beads @hotchocmarsh]

@TeauxTime @MHTruthUltra i’m pretty sure the oil stopped flowing due to another event that occurred in the interim….

[Louise Jensen Duffy (also Ernest Jensen) @LouiseWeebe]

You’re listening to Sisyphus FM, the home of non-stop rock.

[𝓷𝔁𝔂𝓲𝓮 @glooomiii]

ragebait idea: like your own texts during an argument

[maya @mayaviatwitta]

we’ll jump off that bridge when we get to it

[Shannon Sharpe Enthusiast @lankretard]

Genuinely never seen some bullshit like this

[dani @cutestsmallest]

every time I get on a plane they invent a new boarding group so far back that is for only me

[Tristin Hopper @TristinHopper]

I was an extremely guilty child, constantly wracked with shame. I'm happy to report that this trait has not translated to my daughter, who just fumbled a large watermelon, watched it explode on the ground, and declared "oh well, it was heavy."

[Fiona @FionaSmall]

Happy Independence Day, America