every word you say to me hurts.
you act the same, the same as you did when i was allowed to love you. how do you expect me to be okay? how do you expect me to be fine when you are so perfect? when you are so beautiful and when im so inlove with you. i hate when you talk to me.
“its not going to work out.”
i knew that, but if you werent gonna put effort into the relationship, atleast put it into leaving me. leaving me with my heart destroyed. destroyed in one single sentence.
everything. gone in one sentence. over a month of undying, hopeless love and effort and thats what i get. you were everything to me, and all of its gone in a single sentence.
you think youre not enough but youre choosing not to be enough.
if you would just show how much you love me, the way i do, then you truly would be enough. you would be more than enough. but everythings changed since that day. you took me off your wall and never put me back up.
im beginning to feel like you dont care.
because it feels like you used to care.
but now its different. you used to post me. you used to display your love for me to the eye of the public. now you dont seem to do as much as talk to your friends about me.
youre starting to act like a parent with an absent mind. i showed you my art, something i was proud of, and you said nothing. you pretend to care. but you used to care. where did that go?
please stop talking to me like nothing has changed. everything has changed. youre talking to me like we are still allowed to love each other. youre only making this harder for me.
shoegaze music is the atmosphere of sound displaying who you are. i listen to it anyway. it hurts, but so does everything else, because my every thought is you. im still waiting my love.
my love for you wont end. ive never loved someone as much as ive loved you. all i want is to be able to love you.
but i will wait. i dont care that it hurts. i would wait, even until death, but after that too. i dont care what afterlife there is, no matter what i will wait.
it hurts that im not allowed to love you.
you let me fall inlove with you, knowing full well that you were gonna pull it out from under you.
now i have to wait. i have to wait until im allowed to love you - until im allowed to touch you. i have to wait for you to heal.
you know i’ll wait. you know that. because i will wait - i would wait forever for you. but it hurts
i have to stop putting you ahead of me. i have to stop putting everyone ahead of me. i’m hurting, but i’ll let myself hurt because my love for you is infinite.