Howie

[Sama Hoole @SamaHoole]

Testosterone is made from cholesterol.

Oestrogen is made from cholesterol.

Cortisol is made from cholesterol.

Vitamin D is made from cholesterol.

Bile acids that digest fat are made from cholesterol.

Progesterone, which sustains pregnancy, is made from cholesterol.

Every cell membrane in your body contains cholesterol.

Every nerve is insulated by myelin, which is largely cholesterol.

Every memory you form requires cholesterol to build the synapse that holds it.

Your brain is 60% fat, mostly cholesterol.

Breast milk is rich in cholesterol because infant brains cannot develop without it.

Nature, given the job of designing the perfect first food, put cholesterol in it.

When you eat less of it, the liver makes more.

Because the body knows it cannot function without it.

We declared war on cholesterol in 1977.

Testosterone in men has dropped 25%.

Vitamin D deficiency is now endemic.

One in three adults over fifty is on a statin lowering the cholesterol the body is desperately trying to maintain.

Depression rates have tripled.

Infertility rates have doubled.

The war is going well.

[Nicolas Hulscher, MPH @NicHulscher]

COVID-19 mRNA injections can cause SUDDEN ADULT DEATH SYNDROME (SADS) years after injection by permanently damaging the heart with lethal micro-scars.

SIX of our peer-reviewed studies unequivocally show that vaccine-induced myocarditis is NOT "mild and transient," but FATAL.

[doomer @uncledoomer]

we used to be a country

[Stephen A Smith @stephenasmith]

See……this is the B.S. I’m talking about. This is a disgusting thing coming from our Commander In Chief — especially about a VETERAN and PURPLE HEART recipient. #DamnShameful!

[Howie @Howaardg3]

It’s actually extortion

[Proud Elephant 🇺🇸🦅 @ProudElephant]

Taxation IS theft.

[Howie @Howaardg3]

Joe Burrow

[HAWK @HawkEmDownChris]

Name an athlete you wish had a fully healthy career.

I’ll start: Derrick Rose.

[Ethan Brooks @alt_w_v_g]

Karen in HR swung by my office this morning

Asked if I'm joining the Employee Engagement team-building session this afternoon

I said "what is it"

She said "an escape room"

I said "what time"

She said "5pm"

On a Friday

An escape room

At 5pm

On a Friday

The irony of trapping employees in a room they have to solve their way out of at the exact hour they've been trying to escape all week was apparently lost on her

I said "no"

She said "it's mandatory"

I said "so is reading the policy before enforcing it but here we are"

She said "it's about building team culture"

I said "I already spend 50 hours a week with these people. If we haven't built culture by now, a padlock and a flashlight aren't going to fix it."

She said "your attitude is part of the problem"

I said "my attitude built the Q2 forecast in two days. What has the escape room built."

She didn't answer

She left a flyer on my desk

I used it as a coaster

At 4:58 I packed my bag

The analyst saw me leaving

He said "you're not going?"

I said "I have somewhere to be"

He said "where"

I said "home"

He looked confused

Like the concept of leaving at 5 on a Friday was something he'd only read about

I said "you should try it sometime"

Got in the car

My wife called

She said "are you coming home?"

I said "I escaped"

She said "from what"

I said "the escape room"

She said "you didn't go did you"

I said "I didn't need to. I solved it from my office. The answer was the door."

She laughed

First time she's laughed at something I said in weeks

I'm counting that

Plz fix. Thx.

Sent from my iPhone

[Ethan Brooks @alt_w_v_g]

Took the dog to the vet yesterday

Golden retriever

She ate something in the backyard

My wife said "she looks off"

I said "she's a dog. She always looks like that."

My wife made the appointment anyway

Nice office

Fish tank in the lobby

Every professional I visit has a fish tank

The vet came in

Looked at the dog for maybe 30 seconds

Pressed on her stomach

The dog wagged her tail

He said "we should run some tests"

I said "what kind of tests"

He said "bloodwork, X-ray, urinalysis, and an ultrasound"

I said "she ate a stick"

He said "we want to be thorough"

I said "what's the cost"

He said "roughly $3,400"

For a stick

My wife looked at me

Not the ceiling this time

Directly at me

The look that means "if you negotiate the vet bill for our dog I will never speak to you again"

I said "run the tests"

Fastest approval I've ever given

No diligence

No second opinion

No counter

The dog looked at me

Tail still wagging

She has no idea what anything costs

Must be nice

They took her to the back

We sat in the waiting room for two hours

My wife was worried

I was calculating the per-minute cost of this visit

I didn't say that out loud

Therapy taught me that much

The vet came back

Looked at his chart for 90 seconds

He said "good news. Nothing serious. She probably just ate something that didn't agree with her."

I said "so she's fine"

He said "she's fine"

I said "we waited two hours and spent $3,400 to confirm what you suspected when you pressed on her stomach for 30 seconds"

He said "we wanted to rule things out"

I said "what did you rule out"

He said "quite a bit"

I said "name one thing"

He paused

My wife said "we're paying the bill"

I said "I know we're paying the bill"

The vet recommended a "premium digestive supplement"

$89 a month

I said no

My wife said yes

The vet looked at me

I looked at the dog

The dog was asleep on the floor

$3,400 and two hours later and she's the most relaxed one in the room

We paid

In the car my wife said "you were going to negotiate weren't you"

I said "the thought crossed my mind"

She said "it's our dog"

I said "I know. That's why I didn't."

She looked at me

I looked at the road

The dog was in the backseat

Head out the window

Not a single thought behind those eyes

I've never been more jealous of another living thing

$3,400

$89/month supplement

One stick

Non-negotiable

Sent from my iPhone

[Ethan Brooks @alt_w_v_g]

Update: the meeting was this morning

7am sharp

Walked in

My boss, HR, and legal were already seated

I sat down

Opened my legal pad

HR said "we need to talk about your email signature"

I said "which part"

She said "the adjectives"

I said "smart and handsome?"

She said "yes"

I said "those are identified. By me. Per the policy."

She said "the policy was intended for pronouns"

I said "then the policy should say pronouns"

Legal nodded

HR did not appreciate the nod

My boss said "can you just add your pronouns and keep the adjectives"

I said "fine. XY."

He said "those are chromosomes"

I said "and they've never been wrong"

The room was very quiet after that

Legal closed his folder

My boss said "let's move on"

I said "I'm not unreasonable. I'm just saying the quiet part out loud."

Meeting adjourned in 11 minutes

Walked back to my desk

The analyst saw my signature

Asked if he could add adjectives too

I said "you have to earn them"

By noon four people in finance had added identified adjectives to their signatures

The controller added "Identified Adjective: Tired"

HR has scheduled a department-wide meeting for Wednesday

I was not invited

Neither was legal

I think we're on the same side now

Sent from my iPhone

[Howie @Howaardg3]

@OHeybrother @andyfrisella Real AF should be #1 on your list

[Mike Bales 🫡🇺🇸 @MikeBales]

3 Communists walk into a bar, one orders a $15 mixed drink, one a $10 Martini, and the other a $6 beer. When the bill comes, based on their mantra, they are forced to split the bill equally.

Next week, the three, once again, return to the bar, but this time, they all ask for separate checks, so the bartender asks them, why aren’t they splitting the bill equally, since in communism, everyone pays the same fair share. The three communists reluctantly agree, and once again split the check 3 ways.

The following week, the three communists return, but with a mob of devoted followers, and protest the bartender, to change the prices of all their drinks, to the cheapest drink on the menu.

In fear of his business vandalized or burned down, the bartender agrees. So the following week all the communists come in and enjoy their $6 equally priced drinks, and celebrate the successes of communism.

The Communists continue this for several more weeks, until one Friday they return to the bar, to find it closed, with a sign out front, stating that the bar is out of business.

And that comrades, is how communism works.

[Howie @Howaardg3]

@travelingflying You live under a rock?

[ib @novapilgrim]

If you have $0, you get welfare.
If you have $50 million, you get a bailout.
If you have $2,300 in savings, you qualify to fund the whole system and get lectured to budget better.

[Nicki Minaj @NICKIMINAJ]

Reading this made me feel a deep sense of gratitude. We live in a country where we can freely worship God.

No group should ever be persecuted for practicing their religion. We don’t have to share the same beliefs in order for us to respect each other.

Numerous countries all around the world are being affected by this horror & it’s dangerous to pretend we don’t notice.

Thank you to The President & his team for taking this seriously.
God bless every persecuted Christian.
Let’s remember to lift them up in prayer.

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

It’s crazy not to require proof of citizenship to vote in any country’s election

[Fuzzy Chimp 🇺🇸🍌 @fuzzychimpcom]

@BernieSanders You literally can't make this stuff up.

While Bernie tweets about denying food to 42 million Americans, he voted last Tuesday to deny food to 42 million Americans.

[Howie @Howaardg3]

@BernieSanders Bernie don’t you own a private jet my guy?

[Howie @Howaardg3]

@creation247 Banning free speech isn’t a win at all, not an advocate for porn nor do I think it’s “good” however banning it makes zero sense.

All for age verification also, depending on how it’s done but banning it entirely is a violation of several constitutional amendments

[BowTiedRanger @BowTiedRanger]

RFK Jr. is the most accomplished member of Trump’s cabinet to date and it’s not even particularly close

[TazTears💦 @TazTears]

@GavinNewsom