Heather Tetzloff

[Spike Cohen @RealSpikeCohen]

There is only one way to fix this:

Recognize that this is all a scam, that Rs & Ds are in on it together.

Never vote for them again.

Replace them with people who will dismantle their thieving, murderous system.

Don't hate your neighbor, work with them to fix this for good.

[Heather Tetzloff @htetzloff_]

What’s the worst excuse for a call off you’ve ever heard of? I’ll start.

Today a coworker told me she was going to call off so that she could clean her house

[Heather Tetzloff @htetzloff_]

Being in Hawaii is cool and all until you realize just how far away you are from a galley boy and potato teasers

[Heather Tetzloff @htetzloff_]

When I go to the salon and get my hair blow dried I stg I feel like Mia Thermopolis

[Heather Tetzloff @htetzloff_]

Absolutely smoked a 10 year old in a foot race today

[Heather Tetzloff @htetzloff_]

I’m most excited for Jake to come back so he can take the dogs to the dog park by himself and understand my struggle for the past several months

[Ryan @ryanlevon]

Keeping politics out of sports only applies to black people.

[Heather Tetzloff @htetzloff_]

@JakeTetzloff prepare yourself

[human aaron @humanaaron]

you can say “ok john mayer” to any white dude playing guitar and it drives them nuts it’s the greatest thing ever go try it

[Heather Tetzloff @htetzloff_]

@Starbucks please PLEASE give us the disco playlist back. It was THE BEST ONE. I’ll never batch blend a frap again

[Heather Tetzloff @htetzloff_]

I hate it here 🤡

[Hawaii News Now @HawaiiNewsNow]

#BREAKING: Gov. David Ige has approved a new ‘stay-at-home’ shutdown order for Oahu, which to go into effect starting 12:01 a.m. Thursday. https://t.co/F4UgHv2r9T

[Heather Tetzloff @htetzloff_]

@thesagg I’ve tried a lot, but I haven’t tried this... yet

[Heather Tetzloff @htetzloff_]

It’s annoying that I was never taught about skincare/a skincare routine and now I’m trying to figure it out on the fly during a pandemic

[Heather Tetzloff @htetzloff_]

Trying to dodge covid like

[Randy Rainbow @RandyRainbow]

Thanks for constantly reminding me we’re all in this together, the problem is I don’t like any of you. 🖤

[Heather Tetzloff @htetzloff_]

I legit work with school age kids everyday and I can tell you that them wearing masks isn’t actually as big of a deal as some of y’all think

[Heather Tetzloff @htetzloff_]

@hlaneeeee She would have been a year above us and did the same sport as me, if that helps 😂

[Heather Tetzloff @htetzloff_]

Unfriending ultra Christian conspiracy theorists that you went to high school with feels incredible

[Heather Tetzloff @htetzloff_]

For our first year of marriage, Jake and I have seen each other for a total of 4, maybe 5, months